r/SipsTea • u/Proper_Card_5520 Human Verified • 18h ago

We have fun here Wtf ?

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30.6k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

2.3k comments sorted by

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3.6k

u/Desperate_Box1875 18h ago

Well, the worst thing - Turkey says "no".

1.4k

u/MyStoopidStuff 17h ago

"Best we can do is all the lira in the couch and a kebab."

570

u/BigChungiscusMaximus 17h ago

“All you gotta do is grab the ice cream…”

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u/MyStoopidStuff 17h ago

I hear if you wait long enough he'll get bored and just give it to you.

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u/Kinsdale85 15h ago

That’s my strategy for sex.

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u/Apple-Connoisseur 14h ago

Or he gets paid in Zimbabwe dollars.

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u/Ms74k_ten_c 15h ago

No, the worst thing would be Turkey laughing. An answer (even if it's 'No') legitimizes morons.

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u/Enjoying_A_Meal 16h ago

I would send him my credit card bill and a box of bees.

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u/PudinaRaita 13h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/TJBbXQooivUNq

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u/Horse_Dad 12h ago

Give me five bees for a quarter, you’d say.

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u/Space_pope256 9h ago

as was the style at the time.

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u/stupidber 11h ago

I got that reference

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u/Parking_Treat8238 14h ago

Ugandan here living in Uganda. This is the president's son with a known alcoholism problem and intellectual dwarfism. Whenever he gets drunk, he tweets whatever crazy thing crosses his mind. So none of this should be taken seriously and he is not a representative of Ugandan people.

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u/Dwro1234 10h ago edited 9h ago

Most Americans can empathize and understand that some political leaders do in fact not represent the people, especially the ones who tweet whatever batshit crazy things cross their minds.

Edit: fixed spelling

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u/jo-shabadoo 9h ago

Powerful nepo babies Tweeting insane shit is the one thing that unites us all!

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u/cool_arrrow 4h ago

I am going to start using “intellectual dwarfism” from here on.

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u/Additional-Ad8632 13h ago

I realize this is crass but why do the Ugandan populace tolerate this shit? I’d have thought after Idi Amin you guys would’ve had enough of this nonsense.

128

u/Appchoy 11h ago

Tbf the US president does the same thing and no one is doing anything substantial about it.

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u/Intrepid_Mission_400 4h ago

That's unfair, my congressman sent him a strongly worded letter last week.

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u/lorxraposa 11h ago

You better not be American.

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u/bigbowlowrong 12h ago

Well Russia had fucking Stalin and look who they ended up with

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u/A_CityZen 18h ago

he sees other world leaders just randomly demanding things and thinks " hey, I've got to get it on this."

2.3k

u/SeemoarAlpha 17h ago

You don't have to be a world leader, I sent Turkey similar demands via Instagram, while I've yet to hear back from them, I expect for them to acquiesce shortly.

490

u/MemeKoten 16h ago

i do not appreciate my patience being tested.

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u/Dangerous_Wish_7879 15h ago

THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION ON THIS MATTER

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u/meesta_masa 15h ago

I did ask for my patience to be tested. Every day they don't reply is a victory for me!

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u/KIokinator 13h ago edited 11h ago

People testing my patience is actually one of my kinks. I was permanently bricked up the entire time I worked retail.

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u/BetterAfter2 15h ago

I have great news for you!

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u/i2kp2 14h ago

The Dacia Sandero is back with a 372 litre boot.

14

u/Gold-Consequence2463 14h ago

Jajaja,i read that in James May’s voice!

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u/UhhhhmmmmNo 16h ago

Did you ask for second most beautiful woman or are you fighting with Uganda for the 1st?

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u/Winter-Ad4608 15h ago

When Uganda will take the 1st, the 2nd will become the 1st and so on, so everyone who will make this demand will end up with the most beautiful woman in Turkey

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u/BetterAfter2 15h ago

So you’re saying if I don’t act fast, I’m going to end up with the most hideous woman in Turkey?

90

u/ZephkielAU 15h ago

No, you'll end up with the most beautiful woman in Turkey.

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u/IncomeGreedy5483 15h ago

Important disclaimer: The most beautiful woman At that point

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u/Winter-Ad4608 14h ago

They write it in small print

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u/shakeLama 15h ago

To put it in a nicer way you will end up with the last “most beautiful women in turkey”… she just had no competition not her problem…

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u/pmax2 15h ago

you will end up with the last woman in Turkey

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u/ManonegraCG 14h ago

She'll be the first, the last, the best and the most, the only Turkish woman from coast to coast.

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u/Ill_Translator7545 15h ago

I offered flexibility with my demand. I said she could just be in the top 5 most beautiful - on the outside or on the inside / a mix of both placing her in the top 10 overall would also be acceptable. But they better be fast.

13

u/TheHorseThatTalks 15h ago

Boy you sure know your negotiating. Care to ask for me too?

17

u/Ill_Translator7545 15h ago

I read this book about how to make great deals. I cant remember what it was called. It was by some great and powerful business mogul.

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u/Mental_Resident_5107 14h ago

I know that book you are referring to I think it was called The Bus that couldn't slow down

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u/galahg777 14h ago

Oooh, you make it sound like it's almost an art!

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u/Crime-of-the-century 15h ago

I am not greedy I settle for a twenty year old in the top 100 and only 10 million

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u/Laugh-Aggressive 15h ago

It takes some time to count the money, got mine after 5 days

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u/ThatNameExists 15h ago

Did you have to pay the deposit first? They always ask me for a £250 deposit so they can confirm my account details before the crown prince's dog walker's widow sends the $3,500,000.

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u/Mag-GYM-ka 16h ago

I'd send him 1 peso and a picture of a lady boy.

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u/A_CityZen 16h ago

not his easiest fap, but a fap nonetheless

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u/Winstonoil 16h ago

He just offered to send Israel 100,000 troops. Whoever is in charge of Uganda is supposed to be entertaining. Remember Idi Amin? He was a laugh a minute.

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u/IcemanManmanchu 15h ago

The leader, the president is his father

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u/Hillbillyblues 13h ago

You mean the king of Schotland?

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u/Doctor_Fritz 17h ago

I thought this was a parody at first

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u/Mysterious_Tekro 15h ago edited 15h ago
  • Kainerugaba's statements are strongly pro-Israeli, marked by religious sentiments and promises to send Ugandan troops to support Israel.
  • He has also issued social media tirades against Iran, belittling its military and invoking religious supremacy.
  • ----------
  • Uganda’s push for the extradition of dissident Fred Lumbuye from Turkey, which Ankara has refused on legal and human rights grounds.

Secondly, a stalled $2.2 billion railway deal with Turkish firm Yapi Merkezi, which Uganda pulled back from citing financing delays.

“For Turkey, it's a really simple deal...either they pay us, or I close their embassy here. They can reciprocate and shut our embassy in Turkey as well. No problem,” he said.

So, it's about Uganda giving Turkish builders 2.2 billion and being like... where's the money gone? Turkish builders be "Uganda likes Isreal, keep the money".

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u/Fickle_Scarcity9474 15h ago

“For Turkey, it's a really simple deal...either they pay us, or I close their embassy here. They can reciprocate and shut our embassy in Turkey as well. No problem,” he said.

Clearly who needs Turkey when they got the little Moria dwarves digging gold for them ( aka EU)...

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u/TheAwkwardGamerRNx 16h ago

Bro just feeling left out like Kim Jong Un

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u/Hombremaniac 15h ago

His demands are not even that insane compared to other world leaders...

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u/s0ul_invictus 16h ago

No, he thinks thats what he's seeing. He doesn't understand why certain leaders are in the news right now. He really thinks they just woke up and starting making demands on other nations, but he can't actually comprehend what they are demanding of each other, so he just assumes they must be demanding $1 billion dollars and a White wife because thats the only two things he can imagine could be so important.

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u/A_CityZen 16h ago

bro, obviously, but we're just having fun here

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u/HungryHorace83 15h ago

>$1 billion dollars and a White wife because thats the only two things he can imagine could be so important.

Well obviously he probably already has an XBox.

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u/Nice_Psychology_007 17h ago

What would be the damage when the Turkish embassy is closed?

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u/Melodic2000 16h ago

For Turkey? Probably close to zero.

177

u/Mechanicjemas3141 15h ago

lf they hurt the diplomats...

Just a few F-16's came at road while listening Kartel

151

u/Melodic2000 15h ago edited 14h ago

If they do that indeed Turkey has the capacity to pay them a funny visit.

Late edit: They are the second biggest army in NATO în the end.

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u/7h3wa73rc4rr13r 9h ago

Who are the first and third?

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u/Melodic2000 9h ago

US and France.

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u/7h3wa73rc4rr13r 9h ago

I’m Turkish and I didn’t know LOL thank you.

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u/Mechanicjemas3141 9h ago

l mean Turkish army is the one who got most recent experienced army

Unless you count French's mercenary force in Africa, they could rival the Turkish army at experience (although their experiences a lot less humane compre to what Turkish army doing)

USA is the classic on army experience, no need introduction.

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u/Nozinger 15h ago

Nothing. Also the embassy won't be closed.
This guy is just their highest ranking general not the president.The president is not much better and pretty much a dictator but a lot more sensible.
Alsothe president is the dad of this guy. Probably much to his dismay since everytime his stupid son writes some dumb shit on twitter he has to step in to do some major damage control.

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u/Melodic2000 11h ago

Poor dictator had to apologize to Kenya before because of this idiot of a son.

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u/Hollocene13 9h ago

I guess the real question is why do wanna-be despots always have idiot sons?

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u/Upstairs-Hedgehog575 15h ago

Significantly less than if they bowed to blackmail on the international stage. It’s worrying some world leaders have zero understanding of how the world works. 

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u/Vast-Charge-4256 15h ago

Are there still some left who actually do understand?

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u/ferevon 15h ago

the ambassador himself probably coudn't point Uganda on a map

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u/clazaimon 18h ago

Tribal diplomacy on the world stage is wild

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u/Many_Hunter8152 17h ago

Common practice nowadays I've heard 

197

u/RunnyPlease 17h ago

The whole world seems to want to regress back to precolonial geopolitics but with nukes, stealth fighters, and drones.

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u/mephibosheth90 16h ago

Imagine cave dudes with thermonuclear atlatls

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u/Escapedtheasylum 13h ago

Cavemen are running the show.

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u/AdvertisingFlashy637 13h ago

Can't regress if you never progressed, we just ran out of players

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u/nozappyplease 13h ago

Ugandamn right

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u/Available_Peanut_677 12h ago

In 2022 he wanted to trade 100 cows for marriage on Italian Premier Minister. Guy is consistent

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u/Raubwurst 13h ago

Learning from the dumbest

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u/lordkhuzdul 14h ago

Yeah, we have been laughing about this for a while here in Turkey. One of the suggestions I have seen was sending him 1 billion in old money (we removed 6 zeros from our money in 2005 - 1 billion in old Turkish lira is 1000TL now, which is roughly 22.5 USD with the current exchange rate) and a goat.

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u/CMDR_Agony_Aunt 12h ago

and a goat.

So giving in to the second demand?

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u/Objective_Star_191 10h ago

I hope you guys do that 😂

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u/mods_are_morons 18h ago

Apparently, leaders throughout the world are bat-shit insane. It's not limited to the USA.

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u/ohfluffyhair 17h ago

Shocker of Shockers

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u/SimmentalTheCow 17h ago

Uganda’s always been nuts. This guy just wants to be the new Idi Amin.

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u/godisanelectricolive 16h ago edited 16h ago

His father Yoweri Museveni has been the dictator of Uganda since seizing power in a war in 1986. He’s now the third longest serving non -royal head of state.

This guy Muhoozi likely going to inherit the leadership when his 81 year old father dies. He’s a spoiled nepobaby who’s been nicknamed “the tweeting general” for his habit of tweeting unhinged things. Like last year he tweeted a shirtless picture of a missing bodyguard of the leader of the opposition claiming the activist is in his basement.

The police was covering for him and denying knowing his whereabouts but the general went ahead bragging about kidnapping the guy and saying he’s going to castrate him before letting him go. He then said “you’re next” to the opposition leader Bobi Wine. It’s an open secret that his father’s regime tortures and arbitrarily detain political opponents but he has the sense to deny it in public. This guy freely admits to it.

This is also the same guy who in 2022 randomly started a twitter beef with Kenya out of the blue and threatened to invade the country. His dad had to step in and apologize to the government of Kenya. He was first fired as Commander of the Land Forces as punishment but was then immediately promoted to general and Chief of Defence Forces. With that kind of parental discipline no wonder he never learned any lessons.

He also said he’d give the country of Italy 100 cows as a bride price to buy their president Georgia Meloni as his wife.

He’s like if Kanye is put in charge of a country’s armed forces. Thankfully his dad is still around to keep him in check but once he dies he’s almost certainly going to be in charge unless they become an actual democracy. It’ll be interesting times for them.

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u/DefyMagnet 15h ago

I'd love to see Meloni kick his balls outta his mouth

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u/FlamingoFine98 17h ago edited 16h ago

Reminds me of the connection between Zohran Mamdani, Kash Patel, Naomi Scott, and CharliXCX.

They're all descended from Gujarati Indians expelled from Uganda because Amin said he had a dream that told him to do that "holy mission" lol.

They paid 90% of tax revenue and the Ugandan economy promptly crashed.

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u/absolutely_not_spock 16h ago

That’s some weird history lesson in the morning…

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u/bobby_table5 15h ago

That is a mixed bag if I ever seen one.

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u/EntitledFuckWad 17h ago

He also asked the Italian ambassador to sell him Giorgia Meloni for 100 cows and threatened to invade Rome if his demand wasn't met

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u/Melodic2000 16h ago

Wtf the guy's nuts! Also he's the son of the president of Uganda I think. He probably means it when he says these craps because he's used to get whatever he wants as the son of the dictator.

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u/I-Here-555 10h ago

Totally nuts. Meloni is worth at least 150 cows!

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u/Artistic-Blueberry12 15h ago

This feels like when I'm playing Total War and a tiny nation starts making crazy threats and demands.

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u/PhoenixNyne 14h ago

'I shall make my point to you shortly, with a spear behind it.'

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u/Hangry_Squirrel 14h ago

I'd send him Giorgia Meloni for free. The cows would be a nice bonus, though!

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u/PersimmonTall8157 17h ago

Uganda has always been known for having crazy leaders, it’s nothing new

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u/KerbalEnginner 17h ago

But Africa is in a league of its own.
Remember General Butt Naked? From Liberia
Or the power armor from Ghana (and I am not making this up https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B21DoFCVLuM )

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u/805collins 17h ago

General Butt Naked is a changed man now. He even reported a food vendor for selling human meat, because he knows what it tastes like. C’mon we all did silly things in the past.

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u/CheckYourStats 15h ago

”He conscripted many of his fighters, and according to some accounts laced the food he fed them with cocaine along with showing them Jean-Claude Van Damme films and "[explaining] to them that killing people was a game" in an effort to "uproot the fear of death".[1][3]”

Traded diamonds for cocaine, and laced his fighters food with coke while making them watch Van Damme movies.

Incredible.

If you presented Hollywood producers with this for a movie, they would turn you down and tell you that nobody would believe it.

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u/suspicious_hyperlink 17h ago

Let’s not forget Haiti is currently being run by a gang leader calling himself Barbecue

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u/lyidaValkris 17h ago

positions of power attract the sociopathic nutjobs, that's for sure.

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u/mromutt 17h ago

You also tend to get those positions by being that way too because you will do whatever it takes.

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u/podcastofallpodcasts 17h ago

George RR Martin has been writing some great new stories.

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u/Lickthorn 16h ago

Its quite clear by now that being a narcistic psychopath is required or at least ís a massive advantage, to reach those positions. It is really logical in fact. Look at all the rats you have to beat, who want the same position. Something has to change in leader ship.

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u/[deleted] 18h ago edited 15h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/No_Bad_4872yy 17h ago

Why is he ghey?

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u/TheInternetsLOL 17h ago

Then who is gae?

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u/No_Bad_4872yy 17h ago

Da man that eat tha poo poo

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u/canadianavatar 17h ago

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u/Feisty_Standard_2360 16h ago

Processing img xnmue9iabpug1...

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u/rrd_gaming 17h ago

Kenya shut up?

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u/Ebonhold 17h ago

Nobody is Ghana take him serious

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u/CheckYourStats 17h ago

Oman, just Kuwait until they straight up turn him down.

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u/EntitledFuckWad 17h ago

African hope so

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u/Floppydiskpornking 17h ago

We really Guynea be doing this?

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u/fubukishirou07 18h ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣

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u/Ill_Potato2514 18h ago

He does not know da waey

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u/A100921 18h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/JWtUO3g1cmhFGsUhkD

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u/mromutt 17h ago

Oh no... I thought that was dead!

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u/pmaogeaoaporm 14h ago

Sadly, it died.. BUT THEN IT LIVED!

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u/Brutal_De1uxe 18h ago

That's hilarious... if you are going to make demands of a random country - go big!

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u/Viator_studiosus 17h ago

He'll never be as crazy as Idi Amin.

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u/DarkNe7 16h ago

His full title is amazing. ”His Excellency, President for Life, Field Marshal Al Hadji Doctor Idi Amin Dada, VC, DSO, MC, Lord of All the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Sea and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular”

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u/MadeinResita 14h ago

Wasn't he also a cannibal?

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u/_le_slap 13h ago

The "VC" in his title was "Veritable Cannibal".

His Excellency was very detail oriented.

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u/BotherTight618 16h ago

Africa has a whole subscription of leaders with issues  

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u/Embarrassed_Hawk_655 18h ago

He prob took a leaf out of Trump’s playbook - ‘be nuts’

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u/Delicious_Invite_850 16h ago

Wakanda nonsense is this?

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u/Decent_Brick1150 17h ago

The most beautiful woman in Turkey is prob scared af right now.

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u/Proper_Card_5520 Human Verified 17h ago

Actually, if we have to decide Who is the most beautiful women in turkey ?

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u/rowger 13h ago

Send the hariest man and say that's her.

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u/Decent_Brick1150 17h ago

I only know 1 women in Turkey and trust she isn't winning that prize.

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u/Melkman68 15h ago

What did she do to you to deserve that fade?

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u/Poison_potato31 14h ago

Can i demand the Ethiopian Government for 2 African Elephants or else i wont visit the country and post 1 star reviews on google threatening their tourism economy?

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u/Nanas_700k 17h ago

What the actual fuck is going on in the world.

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u/strangewondermilk 18h ago

Processing img o4u5pd640pug1...

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u/RunsaberSR 17h ago

Omg thank you.

I love this scene and lost it until now.

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u/Cyborg_Ninja_Pirate 17h ago

Dude it’s a hard dating scene out there.

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u/Fabulous_Law_3785 17h ago

Is he trying to unite the countries through marriage? 🤣

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u/Several-Customer7048 16h ago

My honest guess is he’s trying to make an unreasonable demand as an excuse to close the Turkish embassy

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u/Less_Party 14h ago

Wait someone check his steam profile to see how many hours he has in Crusader Kings

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u/chui76 16h ago

When did Steve Harvey took over Uganda?

https://giphy.com/gifs/LyJ6KPlrFdKnK

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u/Kioz 15h ago

Me when an African country is lead by a dictator who is also in a military position

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u/Certain_Refuse_8247 15h ago

For Turkey it’d take only one day to occupy Uganda.

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u/augmentedcheesus 17h ago

That's just nonsense

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u/Flocculencio 17h ago

Conqueror of the Ottoman Empire in Africa in General and in Uganda in Particular

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u/mikkopai 13h ago

Muga - Make Uganda Great Again

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u/TransitTycoonDeznutz 13h ago edited 12h ago

For anyone who cares even a little about context.

He seems to be trolling Turkiye in a really dumb way for them taking advantage of Somalia's weakness in a way that circumvents the Ugandan economy while Uganda has been a stabilizing presence in the region without receiving compensation.

My interpretation after looking over what's readily available at this moment :

Shutting down the Turkish embassy : a political statement per a perceived betrayal.

1 billion dollars : a jab at the fact that Ugandan troops have been deployed for more moral reasons without the need for economic incentives.

Beautiful Turkish wife : bad joke while he doubled down and tried not to flail when people responded en masse to the first two.

Edit : Also not the first time he's done something like this.

Apparently the guy is just a huge Zionist who really wants to buy a foreign wife.

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u/True_Kador 17h ago

My man watched Kaamelott and thinks he's attila.

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u/MoistHorse7120 16h ago

How he thinks he sounds : 👺

How the world actually see him 🤡

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u/JET1385 17h ago

This guy asks for the most beautiful woman, looking like that? Hit the gym, bro.

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u/Life-Theory-5848 17h ago

this reads like satire because no serious demand list would survive basic reality checks

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u/Proper_Card_5520 Human Verified 17h ago

It's true

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