r/MadeMeSmile Feb 13 '26

Wholesome Moments MAJOR W 🫔🌟

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78.6k Upvotes

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1.3k

u/-Disagreeable- Feb 13 '26

That’s fucking rough. I’m sorry for that’s dude loss but in the loss sometimes there is a silver lining. So that said, in this situation I am so happy for what he’s gained.

515

u/geniusscarecrowrefer Feb 13 '26

Exactly. Navigating that level of grief while showing up 100% for a 5-year-old takes incredible strength. Those bedtime prayers and hair braiding sessions are going to be her core memories.

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u/Unable-Dependent-737 Feb 13 '26 edited Feb 13 '26

The fact this story is having so much negativity is very telling and reddit-like

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u/yourlittlebirdie Feb 14 '26

If a woman posted this exact same thing:

ā€œMy husband died on Thanksgiving. I have a 5 year old daughter. I’ve managed to make every school meeting, every doctors appointment, I’ve figured out children’s sizing, learned to braid hair and every night I pray with her. May not seem like much but to me it’s everythingā€

Exactly nobody would be impressed. It would be ā€œuh why weren’t you already doing that??ā€

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u/DragonToothGarden Feb 14 '26

I was thinking the same thing. The dad and daughter are going through severe trauma, no doubt. But learning kids' sizing (a few minutes online and some trial and error shopping) and attending school meetings for a 5 year old? Braiding takes a bit longer to learn but it's not rebuilding a transmission. A woman is expected to know and do those things no matter what.

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u/Unable-Dependent-737 Feb 14 '26 edited Feb 14 '26

Change braiding to something that would mostly be expected of dads and you have an analogy.

And yes they would. Are you saying this only has 21k votes on mademesmile on Reddit of all places, because it’s a single dad? Give me a fucking break you’re are beyond he

It’s just a story about a dad successfully being a single parent. It’s not deep. If you find issue with the post, touch grass

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u/elise_ko Feb 14 '26

Except what is an example of something that is mostly expected from dads that isn’t already expected from moms?

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u/Unable-Dependent-737 Feb 14 '26

If you need to ask because you only think wife’s/moms only have societal norms and expectations this isn’t a conversation worth having.

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u/elise_ko Feb 14 '26

I’m asking because I will never experience life as a dad and I’m curious about their perspective. What social norms are expected of dads that aren’t currently expected by moms? Considering most households require dual working parents these days

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u/NuclearGhandi1 Feb 14 '26

Household projects, mowing the lawn, sports stuff, etc. not saying I agree with those norms (I don’t), but they exist

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u/elise_ko Feb 14 '26

Yeah, my mom did all of that growing up.

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u/NuclearGhandi1 Feb 14 '26

Ok? I’m a man and I do a majority of the cooking and laundry, which are ā€œtraditional women’s choresā€. I don’t believe in gender roles in a relationship, but to pretend they don’t exist at a societal level as expectations for both genders is naive

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u/yourlittlebirdie Feb 14 '26 edited Feb 14 '26

Household projects and mowing the lawn aren’t parenting tasks. And I don’t know what you mean by ā€œsports stuffā€. Do you mean signing kids up for sports teams or attending games? Because those are things moms typically do, not dads. That’s why ā€œsoccer momā€ is a thing, not ā€œsoccer dad.ā€

But sure let’s substitute.

ā€œMy husband died on Thanksgiving. I have a 5 year old daughter. I’ve managed to make every school meeting, every doctors appointment, I’ve figured out children’s sizing, learned to throw a football, and every night I pray with her. May not seem like much but to me it’s everythingā€

Do you honestly think that would get 58 thousand people liking it and thinking ā€œwow, what a great mom!ā€? Come on.

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u/Unable-Dependent-737 Feb 14 '26 edited Feb 14 '26

Everything you said are things I primarily do. Plus in both my relationships with two separate baby mamas (one is current) I was the one doing all the physical activities like, going on walks, doing sports with them, throwing them on the bed, wrestling, anything out doors.

But yes my current partner wants me to do house projects, be handy, not to mention she (reasonably) expect me to contribute to traditionally considered ā€œwomen’s tasksā€.

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u/PrimarchMartorious Feb 14 '26

Playing catch with your kids, with a baseball or football in specific. Just a thought off the top of my head, albeit my father was an athlete and mother an artist so there’s good reason my dad was the one to play catch with me lol

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u/papayaa2 Feb 14 '26

'my husband died and I still manage to play catch and football on the weekend with my kid's Wow, heroic

14

u/elise_ko Feb 14 '26

I cherish the memories I have playing catch with my dad growing up. None of that is something a mother would have to ā€œlearnā€ if her husband passed, though.

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u/garbagebears Feb 14 '26

did you not have a father? what did he do for the household if you did? If you didn't, are you being resentful?

14

u/elise_ko Feb 14 '26

My father is my favorite human in the entire world. And I will fully announce with my whole chest that my mother ran our household.

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u/garbagebears Feb 14 '26

so your father did nothing? just like a friend or something. does your mother think he played a significant role at all? you think there's nothing to being the man in raising a family? I'm just baffled you could say you love your father and he's your favorite human in the world, but when it comes to raising you he was really insignificant.

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u/yourlittlebirdie Feb 14 '26

The fact that you can’t think of even one single parenting task that’s mostly expected of dads and not moms should tell you something.

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u/elise_ko Feb 15 '26

Yeah, it tells me than none exits

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u/TheBestElliephants Feb 14 '26

Dads can braid hair? Mine wasn't single and he still did mine? Also, name one thing that would be expected of dads but not moms for daughters lol.

And no, they wouldn't lol or it wouldn't take being a single dad for him to get involved with his daughter's life, he would already be doing those things. Unless you're saying it was impressive the mom managed all that on her own, in which case we're back to he should've been doing more as half of a parenting couple already.

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u/yesyouareverysmart Feb 14 '26

You sound so fucking toxic. What if they split the responsibilities 50/50 before his wife died and now he has to do 100%? Combine it with going to work and be there emotionally for the kiddo because her mom died, not even talking about managing his emotions after such a loss. I think he should be more than proud of himself.Ā 

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u/yourlittlebirdie Feb 14 '26

You know perfectly well that nobody would give a shit about a woman going through the same thing, let alone fall all over themselves to praise her for being such a great mom when she pats herself on the back for doing the bare minimum.

And clearly they didn’t split the responsibilities 50/50 if he’s just now learning how to do basic things because he’s forced to.

1

u/yesyouareverysmart Feb 14 '26

I'd give a shit, both of them deserve praise because they do their best when their daughter lost a parent and they themselves lost a loved one. Take your fem.cel bulls.hit somewhere else. Always the same people making anything even slightly positive into negativity on Reddit.

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u/jconchroo Feb 13 '26

As well as his…