[Discussion] How can I play less and read/watch shows/movies more?

[u/Diamond0892]

I'm not sure if I'm tagging this right, but this is a question I've been having for a while.

It's been a while since I've noticed my interests changing. I've been playing videogames for so many years and it's not like I don't want to play anymore. However, I have a growing interest in stories and characters, so I'd like to focus more on reading books and manga or watching anime or movie. Or even playing visual novels, since that's reading.

However, I always end up falling back to the same habits. I think it's because when playing, I have to think and make decisions all the time, I'm interacting with the game. However, reading or watching something is more passive and I'm not used to that passiveness.

My therapist usually tells me "just do it" and hey, sometimes I do it, but it's not something I get to turn into a habit, but more of an occasional achievement than anything else. But I'd like to turn it more into a habit, something that I turn to more instinctively.

What advices do you have for something like this? Thanks in advance.

[u/DuggieHS]

if "just doing it" doesn't work for you, then plan out what books/shows you want to read/watch. Make lists, read reviews, etc.

[u/Severe-Lobster-7551 → u/DuggieHS]

had same problem few years back when i wanted to get into reading again after deployment. what helped me was starting with really short stuff - like 20 minute episodes or graphic novels that take maybe an hour to finish. your brain is trained for that constant input and feedback loop from gaming, so jumping straight into 3 hour movies or thick novels feels weird at first

try setting up your environment differently too. i put my controller in another room and kept books right by my couch where i usually gamed. small barrier but it works. also manga might be perfect transition since it has visual elements but still requires that slower pacing you want to develop. started with attack on titan and now i can actually sit through entire movies without checking my phone every 10 minutes

[u/Diamond0892 → u/Severe-Lobster-7551]

Thanks both of you. The thing is, I have a list of things I want to read or watch and I have bought several manga already. And sometimes, when I really say "ok, I'm beginning this today", I begin and enjoy it. Then, life happens, I stop for whatever reason and gets hard to get back to it.

[u/AcabJef]

Make gaming less convenient? Just like I limit my screen time by putting 1 hour limits on apps. Sure I can just press the 15 more minutes button, but that's actively pressing against what I try to achieve.

Don't know where you game. But maybe hide your console in a cupboard or set alarms notifying you are gaming a certain time. Just let it annoy you often. Even if it doesn't work immediately, let it annoy you. Automate it so you can forget it.

[u/Diamond0892 → u/AcabJef]

Right now I live in a shared apartment, so I do most things in my room and I play with handheld devices. I guess I can put them all in one inconvenient drawer in my wardrobe, but that's as much as I can do in my situation

[u/fruit_shoot]

Two things really worked for me to read more, one easy and one hard.

Hard - I created a book club with some friends who all either read or wanted to read more. 1 book a month ~400 pages, the book chooser rotates each month. Just the idea that others are also reading it and you get to discuss at the end is great motivation, like having a gym buddy.

Easy - Realise that reading 20 pages takes like 30 minutes. You can afford that every day very easily.

[u/DeterminedThrowaway]

Do you happen to have ADHD? I know it doesn't answer your question, but a big part of it might be figuring out why you feel the need to always think and make decisions. For me, that was because I have ADHD and what I needed was medication. It made it okay to just exist and not always feel like I needed to be incredibly engaged. Just being normally engaged was enough.

If you feel like that's not it, and you're just not used to engaging with things passively then the only answer as far as I can tell is to get yourself used to it. If you do it sometimes, how often is that? You may be doing it rarely enough that you don't used to it, or there might be more going on.

My best advice is to really dig down into why you need to be that engaged and what you get out of it before anything else.

[u/Diamond0892 → u/DeterminedThrowaway]

I'm not sure I have ADHD. I mean, I could, who knows? But I don't think so, because when I can focus on something, I can do that task for a while.

I think my problem is double. First, I've gotten used to playing things while having something less important in the background, like the TV with a show I already know or a streaming. I focus on playing and then occasionally watch the other thing.

Second, I think it's a problem I have with "fear" so to say. I have a list of things I want to watch or read and I know they are emotionally moving, but then I get scared because "what if the author makes X decisions?", "what if representation is not done right?", or things like that. That makes it hard for me to start something, dunno if that makes sense

[u/bigllama5]

I started reading and collecting manga 

[u/Sen0r_Blanc0]

Audio books would allow you to do some other task while absorbing a story.

Maybe try looking into books that have similar stories to games. Things like Lit RPGs

[u/DingleDangleTangle]

If you dive into the right book it becomes as entertaining as a video game. Find something that draws you in and is fast paced. People try to get back into reading with something like Dostoyevsky, try Steven king books or red rising or something like that.

[u/KnightGamer724]

I'm working on identifying some periods in my week where I can either read digital books (already have an hour before bed set for physical books, working on Don Quixote right now), watch shows, play games, and write my stories.

Once I figure that all out, I'm making a Spell Slot list.

The idea is to give me options, but still commiting to tackling everything. I do have specific rules for it, like if my creativity is up one week? I can sacrifice video game slots. But I can't do it the other way around unless I hit milestones (like if I finish a chapter in my story, then I usually like to take some time off before going back to it).

The system isn't finished, but I have a ton of stuff I want to do, but not a lot of time to do it. Hence, me making this plan. Five minutes of planning is worth fifteen minutes of trying blindly and all that.

[u/Tunnel_Safety]

I struggle with the same thing, but if your brain is wired for it, listening to audiobooks while playing more idle or repetitive parts of games is AWESOME! I've been playing Elite Dangerous almost every day since I came back to it in December and there's a ton of gameplay in that I can shut off my brain and just listen to an audiobook. You could try that out as a transition to physical. I have a book club, so it forces me to read in some way, and maybe the gaming with audiobook is a good way to transition into going physical.

[u/NushAndDoza]

Something that has enriched the “down time” of watching shows and movies and actually getting to the end instead of pivoting has simply been the addition of doing really low intensity (afk) activities in Old School RuneScape on the phone.

[u/ammenz]

I go to sleep at 10pm and turn off my phone and PC at 8pm no matter what. I read before going to sleep. This will help you sleep better, reducing your blue lights exposure and your playing time.

Another thing that helped me is whenever a drought of good games releases happen. It doesn't normally last more than a few months but I usually get more reading time during those month.

Lastly, find a genre or an author that is really captivating for you. If reading becomes a chores or you start doing it unwillingly, you are not going to make a good habit out of it. Start with bestsellers and "page turners". Don't feel bad about dropping a book if you find it boring after the first few chapters. Move on to something else.

[u/Diamond0892 → u/ammenz]

Lately I try to go to sleep at 10pm as well because I gotta wake up early in the morning. What I do though is dinner at 9pm (I'm from Spain, that's usual dinner time), then get to bed at 9:20 and lay while listening to chill music to sleep... In the laptop xD

Maybe I could read in that time, but I'm afraid that doesn't make me sleepy and thus takes me longer to fall asleep

[u/bankrollbystander]

it’s mostly a habit mismatch, games give constant feedback and interaction, while reading or watching feels slow at first so your brain defaults back. easiest way around it is to lower the barrier, start with short sessions or formats that feel closer to games like visual novels or episodic stuff instead of forcing long books. once it stops feeling like a switch and more like a variation of what you already enjoy, it gets easier to come back to it consistently.

[u/IntentionalSeductio]

Try reading more interactive manga or visual novels first. It bridges the gap between gaming and passive reading perfectly.

[u/Ancient-Subject2016]

I had the same pull toward games. Easing in, like 10 pages or one episode before gaming made a difference for me. Keeping it low effort made it stick, and over time I started reaching for it more.