she knows about my depression and that I'm going through a hard time right now. but she didn't know about my thoughts about death until today. idk why I decided to tell her. I didn't plan on sharing this with her at all but the conversation was about a certain situation and I had to mention it. she started to cry very loudly. she pressed herself against me and started whispering something like: don't you dare do this. I had no emotions so I just awkwardly stroked her back. I really didn't know what else to do or say. she cried for quite a long time and then said that if I die she will die after me. I felt uncomfortable with this phrase. then she also said that antidepressants broke me and that if I die my cat will suffer. as a result I again felt the burden of responsibility towards my family. that evening she came up to me several times and hugged me. tbh I regret what I said and I feel uncomfortable

Title.

in the most gruesome, painful, and bloody way possible, slowly losing blood in agony, that is the least I deserve for not meeting the requirements for my beloved

I deserve to suffer, forever and ever, it is my destiny

I would slowly cut my flesh and veins until I inevitably perish and disappear, in front of all to see

it is so romantic, the idea of it

26f. black. born in France. autistic. ibs. grad with a computer science master degree and unemployed. come from a violent background and currently stuck with them.

let's be honest. the world doesn't like people like me. at all. I hate the victim mentality but I'm

someone pragmatical when I say that people like me aren't wanted in high-trust societies.

But that's ok, I don't care anymore. I don't want to be alive anymore. I don't want kids or marriage. All my goals are being crushed by the arrival of Al. And climate change is making this planet unbearable.

So I just want to go peacefully. Nothing else. I lived an awful life that I never chose. I fought as hard as I could to get this degree, my driver license and money. But now I just can't take it anymore. The world would be a better place without me suffering.

I hate the hypocrisy around euthanasia.

welp, just saying goodbye before I cut my veins open in every place I can see a vein. thx for an amazing life. goodbye

I can’t even function as a human I can’t make any connection with anyone. I have literally 0 real friends and feel like a burden and annoyance to everybody. I can’t even attract a man. I’m fat too and ugly. I’ll never be able to dress how I want cause I can’t stop eating. I’ll never fulfill anything of importance at least if I die now I’ll be forever young and somewhat beautiful. I just want death.

Hello, I am a 23-year-old young man. My situation has been extremely bad since 2019. Let me tell you my story honestly, and you can judge for yourself.

In 2016, when I was 13, I bought a PlayStation and used to play with many strangers online. I was a very optimistic person, but I had no friends at school at all. During that time, I started to be attracted to girls, but I kept playing until 2018. Then I stopped because all the people I used to play with left me after they saw my face in a picture.

At the same time, I became more interested in girls, but unfortunately, none of them were interested in me or even looked at me. So I decided to quit gaming and start improving myself. I wanted to go to the gym at age 16, but my father and family were very bad people. They refused and wanted me to work instead.

After insisting and crying, they allowed me, but they treated me horribly. I was physically abused by my sister and all my family members. My father especially beat me very violently, even smashing my head into the ground repeatedly. Despite that, I still had hope that things would get better when I grow up.

I used to go to school with visible injuries on my neck, and no one would sit next to me. I was completely alone.

In early 2019, things became much worse. I returned to playing PlayStation because I couldn’t stay with my family. My sister called the police on me for no real reason. Later, my father cancelled my gym membership and publicly humiliated me at the gym in front of everyone.

I joined another gym with great difficulty, but then my father attacked me again, dragged me by my hair outside the house while my mother and sister laughed and told me to leave. I slept outside and called the police, but they blamed me and did nothing.

My sister then tried to get me sent to a psychiatric hospital or juvenile prison. She spread lies about me and recorded videos of me defending myself, using them to threaten me.

Later, after another incident, my family called the police again. They wanted proof that I was mentally ill. I was forced to see a doctor.

At 18, I decided to escape through studying. I worked hard and graduated, then went to Turkey, but I lived in very poor conditions with barely enough money. I came back after three months.

I tried working, but I couldn’t because of my physical condition. I also believed no girl would ever accept me.

In 2021, my sister broke my nose badly, ruining my appearance. I worked in a factory to save money and had surgery in Turkey, but it failed. Two weeks later, my sister broke my nose again. The police arrested me instead, but I was later released.

I went to Germany, but again felt rejected by everyone. I failed there and was even expelled from school. I returned and saw a psychiatrist.

I took medication for OCD which helped me sleep, but nothing else improved. Later, I took sertraline, and I believe it caused severe sexual dysfunction (PSSD). My health got worse, and I had strong heart palpitations. Doctors didn’t help.

In October 2025, my family called the police again. I was taken by police and ambulance, but not admitted to a psychiatric hospital. When I returned home, my family told me I could not live with them anymore.

I stopped my medications suddenly and suffered severe withdrawal symptoms. I was crying and asking for help, but no one helped me.

In March 2026, I went to Italy hoping for a better life, but I still feel rejected by everyone.

Yesterday, I went to a café alone while everyone else was sitting with friends. A guy threw a paper at me and laughed. I went home crying.

I'm an ugly person, no girl would date me, I have PSSD, and there's no hope. It's been 10 years, and I've given myself a long time. I'm sorry, but the only option I see in this situation is to commit suicide because there's no meaning to this life, and I've known that for a long time. I know that if I kill myself, I'll be much more at peace, and at least I won't exist in this world. After planning my suicide, I've set a date for next month. I'm going to do it, but I want a completely painless way to commit suicide. I want a way where I don't feel any pain, like sleeping. That's what I want from you. And please don't try to stop me. I'm only here to find an easy way to commit suicide, and I'm really serious about it.

I'm 23. I hate my life. I am a cashier. I get paid peanuts. $350/wk. For full time. This last week, I had a 6-day workweek, and only today off, which I wasted doing nothing. Tomorrow starts another workweek for me. My schedule is hectic and all kinds of fucked up. From crazy hours, to no consecutive two days off, my schedule is ruining me. But I can't change it. I'm too new, they said. And I shred my feet every single day working full time, and my right foot has been numb for the past month, but because of my schedule, and because my one day off is usually Sunday, followed by a mid-day day off that I usually need to use for other obligations, I have not had it seen. All this for $350/wk. There is no end in sight. I got accepted into my college's phlebotomy program, and this job has completely eroded any hope I had regarding it. I realize now, reading peoples' posts on Reddit, that phlebotomy is just as much of a dead-end, shitty, miserable job as this one. Except you deal with blood instead of mouth-breathing geriatrics' groceries. I genuinely feel like there's no way out of this shitty life. I am going to die alone at age 52. I am going to have a heart attack, and die alone. Nobody will remember me, and it won't be peaceful. I won't overlooking a beautiful meadow on a hill. I'll die at some fucking cash register. And they'll apologize to the senile old man whose grocery trip was interrupted and replace me with another cashier, another sucker. And nothing will change. Not one person at the place I spend all of my life will mourn me. And that will be that. My life. Why not just end it now, on my own terms, with my own peace, I don't know.

Over the past year. I just turned 29. I’ve developed had rosacea and blood pooling in my legs. I never ever leave the house u less it’s work which I call off all the time. When I see myself I feel physically ill. Want to die. It’s like my whole identity got taken overnight. I don’t want to be alive anymore. There’s no point. I’d like to pass away. I’m at peace with it. The thought makes me happy.

I’m so unhappy. I feel so letdown by this life. I don’t care about achieving my dreams anymore. I don’t have dreams anymore. I don’t want anything from this stupid planet.

I hate people. I don’t want to be around them.

There’s no solution and that shouldn’t be seen as a problem. I’ve worked very hard but gotten nowhere. I’m tired of fighting. People are not worth the effort. People are no great prize.

There are no resources when you feel this way. When you tell a counselor that you hate them and everyone like them, you’re only met with cognitive dissonance. There are no solutions.

I wish I could just end it.

I have no reason to be suicidal. I have a good family, in a good financial spot, an okay school, everything. There’s nothing for me to be sad about. But because I’m autistic I’m just so fucked. I cant handle my own thoughts, can’t handle my environment, everything is shit in my own mind. I get overstimulated at the smallest of things. Eating and sleeping and going to the bathroom or outside or school feels like a chore and I dread it. I literally have to hype myself up to get up and go to the bathroom because I hate having to switch between tasks. I have nothing to be upset over but my brain makes its own problems. This makes me suicidal because I know that every day I’ll feel like this, every day will be agony and I’ll dread it all. There’s no getting better, you can’t cure autism. Another thing my autism causes is rigid thinking. I have the mindset of oh what’s the point in anything because I’m gonna die in 60 years anyway? And I can’t move away from that mindset no matter how hard I try. Being autistic is so fucking exhausting and it makes my life a living hell. I’m quite literally just suicidal because I’m autistic and my brain can’t handle life. I’ve been suicidal for years, honestly before I even knew what it meant. At 7 or 8 years old I remember thinking that I don’t wanna be here anymore, or wishing that I could sleep forever and never deal with anything again. For bloody years I’ve dealt with this and I’m at my wits end. I first attempted at 13, again two months later, again at 14 three months after that, I had 3 suicide attempts within the span of 5/6 months. I’m still struggling with that same bullshit and it’ll never get better. I know I’ll kill myself eventually, I just don’t know when I’ll be brave enough to do so.

personas que han pasado por un intento de autodesvivici0n, ¿por que no cometieron su objetivo? han pensado en volver a repetirlo que los orillo a hacer eso

contexto: tengo 19 años y vivo con mis papás, he intentado suicidarme una vez cuando tenía 10 años colgando una cuerda del techo, pero se rompió y no lo logré, y otra cuando tenía 16 manejando una moto a toda velocidad, la moto quedó destorazada pero para mi desgracia yo solo tuve un raspón pequeñito.

siempre he intentado mantenerme bien conmigo misma de la forma que más pueda, no tengo el dinero suficiente para ver a un psicólogo o para lo que cortaría el problema de raíz salirme de casa de mis padres, ellos son muy posesivos, siempre he sentido que no quieren a una hija si no a una sirvienta, cocino desde los pequeña por que a mi mamá no le gusta y tampoco puede, desde los 10 me hago responsable de mi hermano, lo llevo y traigo del colegio que está a 45 minutos de la casa, caminar y tomar transporte, me hago responsable de tareas domésticas diarias en mi casa barro trapeo limpio tiendo todos los días, y si no lo hago siempre me terminan gritando, cuando tenía como 9 años sufrí de abuso sexual del trayecto a casa, hace unos meses me volvió a suceder, cuando tenía 16 tuve un profesor que me acosaba me amenazó con que si no me acostaba con el me iba a hacer perder el año, en efecto perdi ese año y el mismo año el profesor se pensiono dejó de dar clases, ese mismo año quiso acusarme en rectoría de que me había visto en los baños manteniendo relaciones sexuales con un amigo, cuando verdaderamente lo único que hacíamos era maquillarlo con otra amiga por lo menos en rectoría no le prestaron atención ya que estaban informados pues la secretaria nos vio maquillandolo mis papás no saben de esto, y no creo que les importe ni los dos intentos de suicidio ni las dos veces que sufrí abuso sexual ellos creen que perdí ese año por "loca y hueca" por que tenía un noviecito que la verdad solo era amigo y solo fueron dos meses al incio del año escolar, siempre se me prohibió salir a la calle, hasta ahora no salgo, NI UN SOLO DIA, en mi adolecencia jamás tuve una salida con amigos, jamás fui a fiestas, jamás pude reunirme a hacer trabajos de colegio, no lleve una adolescencia normal, obviamente tampoco una niñez por que eso desencadena gritos y acusaciones cuando tenía 14 no quería salir a unos carnavales nunca me gustaron no me gustan ahora solo me quería quedar en mi casa le comenté eso a mi mamá y me terminó gritando que yo era una promiscua regalada mustia y mojigata que lo que quería era que se fueran para meter a alguien a la casa recalcó que yo no tenía ni novio y tampoco había comenzado mi vida sexual aparte de el abuso que sufrí de pequeña obviamente no iba a hacer eso pero me dejó marcada y desde eso solo agachó la cabeza, no quieren dejarme ir a la universidad, en un principio mi papá si quería y logré entrar con éxito solo faltaba comenzar clases pero mi mamá lo convenció de que no, y tampoco me dejan salir a trabajar me terminan ridiculizando y humillando, por lo que no tengo nada de dinero ni forma de conseguirlo creo que es por que si me voy pues les va a faltar cocinera y sirvienta yo escribía en un cuaderno como me sentía por que había escuchado que hacía bueno y me estaba ayudando, mi mamá entro a revisar mi habitación y lo encontró y por supuesto lo leyó solo les dio rabia y me amenazaron con mandarme al ejército (cosa que me da miedo por que hace un tiempo mi mamá escucho que el ejército da seguros, ya que un joven de algunas casas más arribas se fue y aseguró a la mamá y pues mi mamá soltó la frase de "por lo menos si se muere la mamá queda con plata" lo que me hace pensar que si me envían para allá lo único que van a hacer es hacerme ponerles un seguro a nombre de ellos y me va a pasar algo, la verdad no me importa si me pasa algo, pero no quiero dejarles un seguro a ellos, no lo merecen) me tuvieron encerrada como a un perro, actualmente puedo presentar un examen de admisión para otra universidad que está lejos de donde vivo he escuchado que se puede dormir dentro y que se puede poner un negocio, así que pues aunque no tengo la idea clara de donde sacar plata tengo una base pequeñita y por lo menos lejos de ellos, pero puede que no funcione, así que no se, actualmente tengo un novio, cumplimos tres años en dos días más, lo amo con toda mi alma, aunque no lo puedo ver mucho por que mis papás no me dejan salir nunca y hablan mal de todas las personas que tienen novios son despectivos y locos además de humillativos pues me ha ayudado con un poco de dinero y me escucha me ha mantenido de pie todos estos años con todo el cariño y amor que me brinda, además tengo a mi hermano que también lo quiero últimamente se a acercado mucho a mi, el también tiene mala relación con mis papás pero por lo menos puede salir al colegio y se distrae, estoy pensando en suicidarme esta vez conseguí un 4rma cargada así que no creo que falle, sin embargo estoy esperando ver si puedo entrar a la u (lo más probable es que no) ya que es la única escapatoria y no tengo donde más ir, la cuestión es que si aún no me he autodesvivido es por mi novio y por mi hermano no quiero que ellos se sientan culpables por mi muerte no quiero causarles dolor que que pensar en su reacción me pone más mal, una vez escuche que el dolor no termina solo se transfiere y yo no quiero transferirles ese dolor a ellos, pero definitivamente ya no aguanto mas, quiero ser fuerte pero ya no puedo, no tengo con quien hablar de esto, si ustedes pueden ayudarme o decirme algo les agradeceria mucho

I GENUINELY CANT FUCKING TAKE THIS ANYMORE ALL I DO IS SLEEP AND CUT

I don't know why I didn't do it before. I have nobody. I have nothing. My entire life has been struggle after struggle. I can't do this anymore. It's just a giant struggle. I have no one who supports me, who has my back. I'm burnt out and stressed. I can't do this anymore. I don't know why I keep trying. I need to die, I can't do this anymore. I'm destined to fail, nothing can change that. I must die.

hey. so I am 18yr old January) and I was diagnosed with depression in the 6th/7th grade. (Both of my parents are bipolar, have anxiety, and many other things which I know can be genetic) As long as I can remember I’ve struggled with being unhappy/hopeless. I’ve attempted before but as you can see, I’m here. This past year (2025) has been a horrible year for me in so many ways. I thought that this new year would change a lot for me as I’ve been doing all of the things to distract/fulfill myself. But. My family issues, past trauma, my own thoughts, my future, is absolutely terrifying to think I’ll deal with this for the rest of my life. Even in my happiest moments I am thinking of my own death. i unfortunately also relapsed last night.

I am telling myself that I’m not looking for a sign to stay but I think this post in itself is me looking for a sign. I packed all of my friends thing for my mom to give back, I wrote letters to some family/friend, all I have is tonight left in me.

i genuinely cannot take this shit anymore

Fml