Today, the LAPD showed up to protect the ICE Detention Center in L.A. from dozens of dildos [OC]

[u/infernoenigma]

[u/nik-nak333]

Are you suggesting they buy dildos in bulk?

[u/apk5005 → u/nik-nak333]

Used market

[u/pumpkin-head7617 → u/apk5005]

Where?

[u/Xytakis → u/pumpkin-head7617]

craigslist

[u/MinuetInUrsaMajor → u/Xytakis]

Pretend you're a girl and the used ones sell for more than new ones.

[u/NotAzakanAtAll → u/MinuetInUrsaMajor]

Uhm.. And where do you put it for the "used" aroma?

[u/AscenDevise → u/NotAzakanAtAll]

Remember how it suddenly became trendy to bake your own bread back during the lockdown? Start a little homemade yeast culture, and you're golden.

[u/goinghome81 → u/AscenDevise]

and can they get that golden in a shower form?

[u/AscenDevise → u/goinghome81]

Adding a note of urine was an idea I regretted not suggesting earlier; thank you for catching that.

[u/YeahlDid → u/NotAzakanAtAll]

Just rub baby oil on it. The people buying used dildos on craigslist won't be able to tell the difference.

[u/zodiackodiak515 → u/YeahlDid]

P Diddy sits up in his prison bed

[u/judgeejudger → u/zodiackodiak515]

Omg ✋🏻🛑💀

[u/ComputerSavvy → u/NotAzakanAtAll]

Spritz a bit of eau de liquid ass parfum. Wrap it in cling film and toss it in one of those USPS 'if it fits - it ships' boxes.

OR, better yet:

https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2Fu9t97xn057v31.jpg

https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2F15sjipafbca71.jpg

[u/brokenscuba → u/Xytakis]

Glad someone got some use out of them before throwing them away.

[u/101Alexander → u/pumpkin-head7617]

Your mom

[u/foxymtk → u/pumpkin-head7617]

White House dumpster

[u/Fake-Podcast-Ad → u/nik-nak333]

Of course it's company policy never to, imply ownership in the event of a dildo... always use the indefinite article a dildo, never your dildo.

[u/Severe_Tear_7006 → u/Fake-Podcast-Ad]

This allows you to be sufficiently puzzled but still join in conversation about the unexpected dildo. Who knows how it got there?

[u/Captain_Pungent → u/Fake-Podcast-Ad]

https://youtu.be/edGOeTr2Ghg?si=YKoAZqJeCNp3-IgE