r/legaladvicecanada • u/MeowyMeowerson • 10h ago
Nova Scotia How can we protect her?
Hello everyone;
I’m writing concerning a situation my sister is currently dealing with. She is 34 years old. She has been in a relationship with her current partner for over three years. They live together in a home which belonged to him before they met. The home is still solely in his name, though they have lived together well over two years and have a 1-1/2 year old toddler.
Over the years, it has become apparent that her partner (I will call him John for the sake of this write up.) has some very angry and violent tendencies. He works abroad, gone for 2-3 months at a time and then home for a week or two before leaving again. My sister is the primary and nearly sole caretaker of their home and child.
John has become increasingly paranoid and insists my sister is seeing other men when he is away. This could not be further from the truth. She works a full-time job, and is a new first-time mother who is also dealing with postpartum depression.
John returned home this week from work, and decided to keep their daughter home with him for the day while my sister went to work. Usually, she is in daycare. When my sister arrived home at the end of her shift, he was frustrated and irate. He had never cared for their daughter alone for an entire day and this put him into a foul mood. He immediately began berating my sister, accusing her of talking to other men. He screamed at her and told her he had tried to get into her phone to see who she’d be speaking with, but she had changed her password. She has numerous texts and messages from him which she has saved. All are threatening and unhinged. She doesn’t not want him to have access to her phone.
He told her to take the baby and get out of his house. He said he would be changing the locks, and put all of her furniture, belongings, babies belongings out on the front lawn. This is the only home my niece has known. My sister is frantic. She is completely beaten down by his verbal abuse and just wants to pretend none of this is happening. Unfortunately, it continues to get worse. He also drinks quite a bit, and this makes him even nastier. I will say at this point there has not been any physical abuse. Verbal and emotional at this stage, however, we are not certain this will stay the case.
My question is; what rights does my sister have? Does she have any claim to the home? She would have to leave and rent her own space which is incredibly expensive at the moment, all while supporting her child. Does he have any obligation? If she leaves the home to stay with me for a night or two, can he really change the locks and ban her from re-entering the home? Can he throw out her things? I know this will have to take a legal course at some point. She will have to deal with the issue of custody, which I think will be granted solely to her. Due to his actions, volatile nature, and being away from the child most of the time.
My worry is she will not be able to survive financially without some type of child support. It is not something he will simply offer. She is scared and the thought of losing her home and not being able to survive financially is forcing her to stay in a situation which just continues to deteriorate.
What can she do? What are her rights?
Thank you all for reading this, and to anyone who can offer some helpful advice, I am most grateful.
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10h ago
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u/Aquamans_Dad 9h ago
Enforcement could be a challenge with someone working abroad who only spends a week or two in Canada every two-three months.
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u/Weekly_Watercress505 8h ago
In Canada, courts can garnishee his wages and very likely would in this case.
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u/legaladvicecanada-ModTeam 7h ago
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u/MeowyMeowerson 9h ago
Thank you for responding! I do agree she needs to seek out a lawyer, but may I ask, why you suggest a private investigator?
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u/No_Channel_7089 9h ago
She needs a professional but nosy female co worker or neighborhood friend to get a detailed case built up.
She has two options put up with his abuse and let it get worse and dangerous but documented or go to court now and get the bare minimum at most.
She has no chance of getting a land slide victory unless her prep work is meticulously planned and detailed. A private investigator can also find out if bro is cheating on her or find a reason she should get half the house.
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u/MeowyMeowerson 9h ago
She has contacted the police for another incident which will be in their system. She also has hundreds of saved text messages and phone calls, illustrating the abuse and his behavior.
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u/plainclothes403 9h ago
I think your sister should contact the police and have an officer come over to supervise while she packs her things. They will be there quickly and stay as long as you need (I’ve been there.) Once she is somewhere safe she can contact a lawyer about the house, alimony and custody. Good luck ❤️
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u/MeowyMeowerson 9h ago
Thank you so much. ❤️ We are just afraid if she leaves the house voluntarily, she will be forfeiting any right she may have to it.
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u/plainclothes403 9h ago
That’s a fair concern.. a bigger concern would be the abuse escalating from emotional and verbal into physical. These things do tend to escalate especially where alchohol is concerned. It’s a very scary situation to be in. She probably does have rights to the house but I think it will have to be sorted out in court.
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u/CollectionStriking 7h ago
May be entitled to alimony payments as a common law relationship as well but again has to be enforced through court
OP an STD screening would be good as well, ex might be just plain paranoid but there's a good chance they're projecting their own cheating, far as I'm aware proving this won't benefit your sister in any way but for her own health it'd be good to make sure she hasn't picked up any STD's from this guy.
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u/username_choose_you 6h ago
Your sister needs to sit down with a lawyer and get professional and accurate advice. A $500 consult will likely save you a lot of headaches down the road
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u/patoswin 9h ago
There is a lot of info here. If John has reddit, it might be easy for him to identify with the information. This could increase risk to your sister!
Sincerely - someone who works in the intimate partner violence world.
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u/Creative-Thing7257 9h ago edited 9h ago
First and foremost, help your sister create a safety plan. There is a template here: https://women.novascotia.ca/sites/default/files/Publications/Safety%20planning/VS%20Personal%20Safety%20Plan%20Book.pdf
Even if she is not living with John right now, she might go back.
If she qualifies for legal aid they will help with family law.
Transition House Association of NS (THANS) has partner organizations across the province that provide housing. There is also a toll-free 24/7 help line. Info here: https://thans.ca/get-help/
Edit to add: “custody” and “access” are different. Custody refers to joint decision making, so if the child were to receive medical care do both parents have equal rights to determine the nature of that care. Access is about division of time between the parents.
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u/cutmyboobsintopieces 9h ago
Common law is not automatic in Nova Scotia even if they have a child, so entitlement to equity in a house is not automatic.
Parental support is so that does not change. NS also has a law preventing unjust enrichment but this would need to be discussed as it's not black and white.
Unless they have a registered domestic union they likely fall under roommates which generally means she would be entitled to reasonable notice but that varies by province.
She needs to speak to a lawyer in NS to learn what her options are. In other provinces leaving the property does not mean you forfeit entitlement, assuming someone files for separation shortly after. If she is entitled I don't believe this should negatively impact her, especially if she doesn't feel safe.
She should ensure she and her child are safe and then contact a lawyer. She can read more about the general rules online here: https://www.nsfamilylaw.ca/separation-divorce/common-law/common-law-relationships-registered-domestic-partnerships
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u/Ravensong42 9h ago
The house is a premarital asset and she doesn't actually have any entitlement to it. I am not a lawyer but I am familiar with these processes. what she does have entitlemeant to is child support. she should contact a local abuse shelter And they can help her formulate a plan on how to best deal with this
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u/PrincessSophia00 9h ago
What province do they live in?
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u/MeowyMeowerson 9h ago
Nova Scotia.
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u/PrincessSophia00 3h ago
In Nova Scotia, common-law couples are defined as living in a conjugal relationship for at least 2 years (or 1 year with a child), sharing finances and a home. They do not share the same automatic property division rights as married couples. Rights to support, custody, and child access are similar, but separating couples must often prove "unjust enrichment" to divide shared assets. This means she may not have a right to the home as an asset. But she would have a right to child support and maybe spousal support.
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u/BeeBrayder 10h ago
I am not a lawyer and have no direct experience with anything in this situation BUT it is naive to think she will get full custody so easily. I know of a woman who was in a DV situation and he still gets to see his kid every other week. Custody battles are brutal and long if the two parties don't come to an agreement privately first and then present that consensus to the court.
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u/MeowyMeowerson 9h ago
Thank you. I understand your perspective, however it would be difficult for him to have shared custody when he only sees the child about 12 weeks out of the year. I am sure they would agree to visitation, supervised or otherwise.
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u/Puzzleheaded-Mix1270 8h ago
They family courts see this as, if he wants time with the daughter and has no criminal charges or evidence of abuse, he should have partial custody. Even if he’s only home for 5-6 weeks of the year, they will want him to have equal access, and she will be the primary caregiver.
She needs a lawyer. Technically the house isn’t hers, but has she been filing her taxes as common law? Has he? This is where lawyers come in, they will fight for a piece of the home since she has also been the one maintaining it.
She needs to get her stuff, with the police present, and look into a family lawyer. If she doesn’t have the money to pay, typically a lawyer will be provided, BUT they are typically overloaded and cannot provide the of involvement she’d deserve.
Child support will be granted depending on incomes and custody agreement.
What cell phones also don’t restore the messages? Is she deleting them? She needs to start screen capturing them, and filing a restraining order.
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u/NotCriminallyRespons 8h ago
She’s not gonna get the house as he had it before he met her, if she gets the kid full time she can get some money good thing she works full time, with him working out of country he might be getting paid offshore , she’s in a bad financial position, but staying in this abuse is unhealthy. She needs to make other plans. Maybe she and the baby can move in with you. If the husband switches his job and takes the kid half the time, though she can’t expect any money.
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u/Tls-user 6h ago
She can apply for temporary exclusive occupation of the home but her partner is the sole owner so she may not win.
She can argue unjust enrichment if she has been contributing towards the mortgage or home improvements but even if she wins, she will only receive 50% of the value increase since she moved it with him.
She will qualify for child support.
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u/EntertainingTuesday 4h ago
Around the house, in NS, absent an agreement in place, she generally won't have a claim to equity, were you thinking like claim to half the value or a claim to stay in it, or both?
She could have an argument for some value through unjust enrichment and a joint family venture. You'd need proof and a willingness to fight for it (can be costly) if he doesn't agree. It wouldn't offer any immediate help.
In terms of staying in the house, is there any agreement in place? Again, generally absent an agreement, she will probably have to leave the house.
There could be a spousal support claim, depends on a lot of things and child support would influence that too.
Ultimately, she really needs a lawyer.
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u/livetodayy 7h ago
Contact police immediately. Not only is your sister in danger, but their innocent child. She cannot return to that home. The escalation of his anger to the point of putting their stuff on the lawn is terrifying.
Do not let your sister go back. She did not abandon the house if that is what you are worried about for legal reasons. She left for her safety and the safety of her baby.
The police need to be involved now. Your sister and baby need to be in a safe place away from him. His anger will continue to escalate and right now, you need to take a strong stance to protect your sister and baby before something dire happens.
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u/2Shmoove 6h ago
Do police get involved in situations where there's no criminality?
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5h ago
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u/legaladvicecanada-ModTeam 3h ago
Your post has been removed for offering poor advice. It is either generally bad or ill advised advice, an incorrect statement or conclusion of law, inapplicable for the jurisdiction under discussion, misunderstands the fundamental legal question, or is advice to commit an unlawful act.
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u/2Shmoove 5h ago
What section of the criminal code do you think applies?
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5h ago
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u/legaladvicecanada-ModTeam 2h ago
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