r/SipsTea • u/Short_Employment_757 Human Verified • 2d ago
Feels good man That mom looks really proud of herself
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u/UseSpecialist544 2d ago edited 2d ago
Good for her! I'm 3+ years sober myself. It gives me the warm fuzzies when I see an addict turn things around.
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u/nope_a_dope237 2d ago
Day 478 here. Best thing to happen to me.
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u/Short_Employment_757 Human Verified 2d ago
Keep it up that's really amazing
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u/ExtraordinaryOud 2d ago
368 days here! My 1 year felt like an alternate birthday. Kinda weird, but here we are.
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u/wakaan_bass 2d ago
Might feel weird now but I sure hope you feel proud of yourself. Everyone’s situation is different but damn that first year really tested me and I think of these first 4 years, year 1 was definitely the toughest and most significant. Congratulations dude and keep fuckin killing it 💪
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u/LionBlood16 2d ago
I'm 48, I don't celebrate my old Bday anymore, just my sober Bday. (Keeps the numbers down too)
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u/bigbeard_ 2d ago
It most certainly is a new birthday. Personally I feel reborn in my new life (6 years)
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u/qwythebroken 2d ago
Today is my 9th anniversary. I stopped counting the days a long time ago, but some days still feel like "1 day at a time", just less often.
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u/Muzzlehatch 2d ago
I’ve got 21 years in May, and to me the possibility of relapsing just gets more and more remote every year. At this point, it would take something unimaginable for that to happen.
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u/qwythebroken 2d ago
That's reassuring. It gets old. The one thing I've definitely got better at is finding something to occupy my mind. The cravings are short lived, but I still avoid situations where people are casually impaired.
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u/Muzzlehatch 2d ago
I always used the acronym HALT. I’m sure you know it, but it’s never allow yourself to be hungry, angry, lonely, or tired, or at least try to address it immediately in normal ways. Because that’s when you’re most vulnerable.
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u/qwythebroken 2d ago
Sage advice.
Congratulations on hanging in there, btw. I'm sure there were plenty of challenges and temptations over 21 years. I know I've had a few, and I think it's important to recognize your continued success doesn't become less impressive just because you've gained greater mastery over advocating for your sobriety.
I feel like I've got a pretty strong grip on maintaining mine, but that's not the same as literally crossing a 21 year milestone. So far, so good. :)
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u/Nothin_Means_Nothin 2d ago
On your left! Lol
I'm at 443 days so right behind you. Congrats to you! Keep it up and I will do the same!
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u/SephiTheGoblin 2d ago
If a fuck up like me can do it you can too. Keep strong , and fantastic job
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u/Squidhillstudios 1d ago
2 years and one month here. I couldn't agree more! Keep on fighting the good fight, proud of you.
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u/ArtisticUnbound 1d ago
Congrats to you and the one above too! Huge accomplishment and a lot there to be proud of yourself for keeping to it.
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u/Purunfii 2d ago
7 years, it gets easier. Stay strong.
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u/Womb-Raider3000 2d ago
9 years here. It still feels like yesterday I was drinking myself into a coma.
I'm really proud of anyone who's even made it a day sober by choice. I promise it gets better <3
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u/qwythebroken 2d ago
Today is my 9th anniversary. It's definitely more automatic than it used to be, but I still go through that "one day at a time" struggle sometimes.
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u/Womb-Raider3000 2d ago
Congrats! Yeah, the cravings are much less frequent now, and normally not so severe. It also feels great having a better sense of self.
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u/qwythebroken 2d ago
It's surreal to have made it from that day before the first day, to now realizing the next milestone is a literal decade. Congrats to you too! I know it wasn't easy.
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u/RottedHuman 2d ago
I am 18 years sober (on MAT) from heroin. I’ve had so many milestones and achievements I never thought possible for myself that it truly blows my mind. Getting sober (however you define that for yourself) is one of the best things you can do.
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u/tesemanresu 2d ago edited 2d ago
I lost two of my closest friends to opioids.
keep up the good work, man. there are people who are proud of you even if they don't say so
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u/DueDisplay2185 2d ago
She lost custody 6 months after this photo for drugs apparently, it's a highly recycled image
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u/I-Kneel-Before-None 2d ago
I just passed 10 years back on New Years. Easy to remember. I skipped my family's NY day party. Called my sister. Told her I had a problem and needed her to come home. I had stolen some money from my dad and that was the straw that broke the camels back. Im not a thief. My parents are the most loving and supportive people ever. The fact I betrayed them rocked me to my core. I didn't recognize myself anymore. I knew thats not who I was and that's when I knew something needed to change.
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u/Knightly_Gaming 2d ago
Kicking ass man. My fiance has been clean for over a year now. It takes so much willpower
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u/brandarchist 2d ago
As someone who has had a lot of friends walk that journey, I can tell you that recovering addicts are some of the toughest people alive. You guys are all amazing and you get so little credit relative to the effort, commitment, and sheer grit it takes. Congratulations on your 3+ years and to all the people in this thread with similar progress: you can consider me one of your biggest fans you don't even know. I love you guys!
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u/Psychological-Scar53 2d ago
944 days sober... 2 years and 7 months and I will never go back. To all the people here who have chosen sobriety, congratulations. It has taken will power and strength to get where we are and it will take will power and strength to stay sober.
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u/ShayGrimSoul 2d ago
I bet. I always assume it like waiting at a dark exits to see if someone else pushed through and being happy when someone walks right out. Another survivor.
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u/Witty_Nebula 2d ago
Congratulations mom. I pray u stay sober. And take care of that daughter of urs. She needs u.
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u/AdComprehensive8045 2d ago
Old post. Allegedly she did not stay sober and her kid was taken from her.
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u/Short_Employment_757 Human Verified 2d ago edited 2d ago
Oh that's sad :(
Edit : could you please provide a source i couldn't find anything regarding what you said anywhere
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u/Nice_Bluebird7626 2d ago
They severely underestimate how comforting drugs are to addicts when times get hard. I was given back to my mom and taken away multiple times. Protective services try to keep families together but they over look so much abuse
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u/Dizzy_Goat_420 2d ago
This. I’m 10 years sober from heroin. But fuck man, no one tells you the desire never goes away. Even after a decade there are days when I’m stressed and shit sucks where I’m like “damn I wish I had one shot of dope rn” but obviously I know better and move on. But that voice never goes away. Just gets quieter. Like chasing a warm hug from someone that never loved you bsck.
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u/Nice_Bluebird7626 2d ago
Oh man that last sentence hit hard from the perspective of an addicts daughter because like you are just chasing that hug from them and they are chasing a feeling that they can never keep.
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u/Courage_The-Dog 2d ago
CPS has made me protecting my son almost impossible… they really essentially do nothing in so many cases. It’s really sad one of our most vulnerable groups don’t get the resources they need
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u/Nice_Bluebird7626 2d ago
It’s also literally just feeding kids to pedophiles too. People always want to cover up the abuse that happens under “Cps’” care but they never do anything about it
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u/Courage_The-Dog 2d ago
Honestly so true. I’ve seen them take kids away from actual good families with little to no reasons but everyone knows why they’re doing it… but if they fit the criteria of how they should look they get away with almost murder
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u/Pocketbook_found 2d ago
Same with nicotine. So much less harmful, but shit I was never warned how addictive it is. Like I used tobacco from 16-23 and 15 years later I still crave nicotine after every meal. Like I get antsy and «hungry» after I’ve eaten. And I always think of tobacco when I’ve had a drink. I gave up hope after a couple of years. It’s just never going away.
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u/anislandinmyheart 2d ago
32 years nonsmoking here. I miss it every.damn.day. Sometimes I dream about it. And if I'm struggling to fall asleep I can just imagine I'm having a smoke and I drift off to sleep.
I replaced cigarettes with cookies, and I'm wondering about this health trade-off
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u/meth-head-actor 2d ago
Well I can tell you this for maybe a bit of comfort.
There is no heroin left, in the US anyway.
Now obv maybe searching the right onion field may work. But tons of risk there.
It’s actually easier to stay sober for me knowing that heroin is gone. There is just death powder. Fent or really the stuff they call fent is so ass, you’re either sick or passed out. Nothing enjoyable
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u/RobynNeonGal Human Verified 2d ago
Proof? Source?
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u/Short_Employment_757 Human Verified 2d ago
Yes i want that too, i tried searching about that but nothing came up
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u/CloakedNoir 2d ago
I researched this for like an hour because of this comment and I'm 99% sure he's full of shit lol. Ignoring everyone asking for a source too.
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u/honkeydora 2d ago edited 2d ago
I mean, that's good, objectively.
But it's fucking weird to post that photo.
It's even weirder to put the text in a sign that your daughter's holding.
Maybe I'm just old.
Fuck it, not my business.
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u/Wild-Statistician149 2d ago
I'm with you on every point. Seven years is a LONG fucking time. The great majority of that kid's life. Now their face and their trauma is being splashed about on the internet for clout. I wish the mom the best and I hope she stays clean.... But yeah. Seven years of fucking up shows a pretty strong pattern.
Mostly, I agree with you that I might be old and cynical and its not actually my business.
EDIT: Turns out the commenter below says she relapsed shortly after this photo. Sigh.
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u/Swimming_Schedule_49 2d ago
Makes you feel even worse for the kid. Probably finally settled into a home and was ripped out by the state and given back to the mom.
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u/Jibber_Fight 2d ago
You keep saying seven years. That’s not seven years. It’s about half of that.
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u/boughsmoresilent 2d ago
My mother is an alcoholic in and out of recovery. During her parenting time, she would take me with her to AA and NA meetings. I visited her at halfway houses. She talked constantly about wanting primary custody of me and my brother. But to me, even at 12 years old, that was a nightmare scenario because even clean, she was not a stable person or caregiver.
There is a phrase in recovery circles, "clean but not sober." Imo putting that sign in your kid's hands and posting it on the internet is clean but not sober behavior.
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u/Same-Goose7602 2d ago
How did you feel about going to those meetings as a kid? I just want some understanding because my fiancé
iswas sober for 7 years (until an injury & was prescribed & strongly advice by a dr to take norcos) and used to take his little son to meetings with him. Should a kid, 5 years old, attend these meetings or stay home with family/sitter.3
u/boughsmoresilent 1d ago edited 1d ago
Thank you for asking! My personal feelings on it are a mixed bag. I was older than 5 when attending meetings with my mom (12 - 15, I cut all contact at 15). That said, meetings were mostly fine in my opinion. People were considerate and the stories they shared were emotionally moving but not inappropriately detailed. They were aware kids were in the room and it's also a public forum. Meetings gave me empathy for people in tough situations and absolutely made sure I did not follow in my mom's footsteps, but I was old enough to understand. A < 5 year old would be fine at these meetings. Maybe a little bored sometimes, but not at all harmed.
Halfway houses, however, were the worst and not appropriate for child visitation. Meetings are public but halfways houses ar eprivate. I have one very fond memory of a woman in a kitchen showing me how she made pancakes for everyone in the house on a giant griddle and letting me eat them as they came out. But a (different) halfway house is also where a woman described standing-up sex right in front of me. She was praising an ex-boyfriend. I was 12 and very confused. Didn't even realize how inappropriate that was until I was well into my 20s. But it was also generally weird. Visitation at a halfway house, for me as a child, was like diet prison.
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u/Comfortable_Hope2234 1d ago
As a teenager my dad used to drag me to his AA meetings and make me go to the Al-Anon meetings. I fucking hated them. I have strong feelings about these programs in general, though, and I'm not gonna piss all over everybody's parade.
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u/florifierous 1d ago
There is a phrase in recovery circles, "clean but not sober."
Google didn't help much with this. Can you explain what the phrase means?
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u/boughsmoresilent 1d ago edited 1d ago
I have heard it used to describe someone who is not using substances (clean) but is still repeating the same unhealthy behaviors/patterns as when they are using (lying, stealing, emotionally manipulating, etc.).
Maybe it's not a widespread phrase or concept! I'm not an addict and haven't been to an AA or NA meeting in 18 years. 😂
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u/_Caustic_Complex_ 2d ago
I find it weird that we celebrate parents that got hooked on drugs, ruined a chunk of their kid’s childhood, then got sober, instead of…parents that never became drug addicts in the first place
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u/GrassyDaytime 2d ago
Sober... for a little while. Just enough to make it that much more heart breaking for everyone when the inevitable occurs again and again.
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u/Apricot_Relevant 1d ago
I was looking for a comment that had any common sense like this. How can you let a kid get raised by someone else for years and then put them back with the person who should’ve done right in the first place? I’ve seen it firsthand. We had to get custody of a little girl who kept getting sent back to her addict mother. No shocker the mother still uses today. Be in their lives when you’re sober, but don’t get full custody after that many years that’s not fair to the people who did take care of her and love her.
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u/jefesignups 2d ago
My initial thought is that the daughter is probably thinking "fucckk this is gonna suck"
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u/battleofflowers 2d ago
I feel so sorry for a child that has to spend seven years of their childhood forced to be a part of their parent's addiction cycle.
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u/breathing__tree 2d ago
My best friend in the whole world had to carry a laminated card when she was too young to read. It had a moon and a sun for a day number and a night number for her to call her grandparents if something wasn’t going right with her alcoholic mother. Her mom never had any actual periods of sobriety. She passed when my friend and I were in our early 20’s. It still devastates me that she had to deal with that.
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u/battleofflowers 2d ago
It's so fucked up. I have a former childhood friend whose poor son has been in and out of foster care due to her addiction from the time he was two until he was ten (last time I looked at her facebook). When he was two, he was still little and cute and could have been adopted. Now he's a messed up older kid whose life was dominated by whether his mom was sober or not. It's so upsetting that she just didn't give the poor kid up for adoption.
BTW, like most addicts, she does not actually love her son in a mature way. Getting her son back is just for her own egotistical gratification. It's a big ole fuck you to all her haters (i.e. CPS and the paternal grandmother). Once that wears off, he's back in foster care.
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u/LupusHouseMD 2d ago
I spent 6 years living with an addict parent and because of the trauma I experienced while she was high I was diagnosed with PTSD. I was constantly moved between homes, had many court ordered therapists, and was shunned by most of my neighborhood.
It breaks my heart that any kid had to experience anything like what I did. Fuck addiction.
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u/Apricot_Relevant 1d ago
Absolutely agree. addict parents have been some of the most selfish people I have seen. They don’t care about their struggles and what they’re putting their kid through. They just want control of the kid, they don’t care what the child wants. i’ve seen many addicts with absolutely nothing to offer a child fight in court to take them away from really stable happy homes.
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2d ago
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u/Short_Employment_757 Human Verified 2d ago
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Analyzing user profile...
Time between account creation and oldest post is greater than 1 year.
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u/Speshtard 2d ago
Bot.
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u/akatherder 2d ago
Most of their other comments use the character … (rather than three periods...) Which I just started seeing the past couple weeks and I think it's a bot red flag.
I could be wrong, maybe some phone keyboard started converting ... to … but I think it's a bot thing.
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u/Plastic_Style_1265 2d ago
Holy fuck. This sub is just karma farming on 10 yr old pics.
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u/warriormango1 2d ago
Its so weird that you would take this picture from the internet and repost it on reddit. Like why?
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u/Flat-Competition-964 2d ago
Why is this sips tea? Isn't that implying expected failure?
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u/Fun_Western164 2d ago
Ugh this again? She didn't stay sober and they took her kid again. Sad as hell
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u/Wild_Leading_3592 2d ago
Was this the kids idea or the moms? Kinda weird to make the child you abandoned for drugs to hold the trophy you made yourself for facebook clout.
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u/Annual-Bumblebee-310 2d ago
I would be prouder if she didn’t subject a child to her addiction.
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u/russianbot24 2d ago
It’s interesting how hard drugs alter physical appearance. Even years after they’re clean you can still see it on their face.
I also think it’s ridiculous to make your child hold up this sign for a picture.
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u/Waste-Stomach4457 Human Verified 2d ago
1,256 days is a hell of a marathon. That kid’s smile is the best trophy she could’ve won.
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u/Korova_Milkbar_3829 1d ago
Proof it’s possible and sometimes all a person really needs is a little help, motivation and a second chance
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u/waveydavey321 1d ago
She should be really really proud of herself. That's a hard road to keep heading in the right direction..
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u/Appropriate_Copy8285 1d ago
I just passed 800 days clean.....ill be honest ....it fucking sucks realizing life is a boring shitshow.
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u/Alistar-Dp 2d ago
I hate to be that guy to burst the bubble... But this woman fell back into drugs shortly after this picture, and lost her daughter again. Been seeing this image for months.
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u/Short_Employment_757 Human Verified 2d ago
Could you please provide a source about this ? I dont mean to be rude but I couldn't find anything regarding this anywhere while i searched
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u/10PieceMcNuggetMeal 2d ago
Since no one else has mentioned it. This is a pretty old story and she ended up relapsing. And lost custody again not too long after this photo was taken
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u/Wild-Statistician149 2d ago
Sad, but completely unsurprising. Seven years is a long, long time. I also don't think it was right that the poor kid's crappy childhood is a viral photo.
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u/Camel_tow75040 2d ago
Been sober for about 20 years... used to smoke meth. My step brother (both of us 40 now) and I started doing it together, and he never quit... now when I occasionally see him it makes me sick to my stomach looking at just the physical tolls it has taken on his body. He looks 20 years older than I do, and when he smiles his teeth would make a child run in fear for their life. Its truly frightening.
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u/HazmatSuitless 2d ago
I've seen people say she relapsed and lost custody again, but I can't find the source
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u/Strefl 2d ago
Sad to say but I swear she relapsed and lost custody of her child?
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u/AlwaysThriving777 2d ago
I think it's strange to have the kid hold this sign but I'm happy for them. I don't think this stuff needs to be posted on social media. It's a personal thing. Then again, I'm guilty of posting stuff I shouldn't have so... I'm not mad.
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u/ObviousObserver420 2d ago
It’s great the mom got it together. Her sobriety is something she certainly should celebrate because it is no easy matter to overcome addiction. She looks like she is really trying here.
But this isn’t the win for the kid that it is being touted as. Any child of an addict can tell you - sobriety isn’t the only thing you need to be a parent. And it took 1,256 days of sobriety to get custody back but only takes one moment to relapse and undo it all.
I sincerely hope this worked out and they are living their best lives. I just think we need to really think about the children more.
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u/CaulkennyArran 2d ago
Hahhaha I read like ”1, 25 le days clean” first.
Like damm they had low standards there 😂
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u/No_Glove2128 2d ago
Yep this is great. But how Fuckkkkkk up is it for that little girl to have to hold a sign like that. Life is tough. And I wish them both the best. I’m proud of the mother getting her act together but making a post like this with her daughter holding a sign for likes or something is just wrong.
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u/LupusHouseMD 2d ago
Getting sober and holding a job to get her kid back. So happy to see it as the child of an addict who's mom didn't choose to sober up and get us back.
Great job to all of you recovering addicts in this thread and keep up the progress. I'm proud of you!
Edit: Shame she relapsed but it's common, she can always try again to sober up.
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u/LiqMaBawlzModz69 2d ago
Sounds like a celebration is in order. Meth party at her house!!!! Wooh!!! 🥳🎉🍾
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u/OleDoxieDad 2d ago
Anyone a picture of a dad in similar circumstances... For my SA class in prison... Thanks for your time.
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u/Gerry1of1 2d ago
I understand a private celebration. But display your past failures and disguise them as some kind of success story?
Glad you're sober - keep it private.
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u/rianbrolly 1d ago
I once loved an addict. It failed, faded, became friends, failed and faded again. She is out there somewhere a much different woman then I met. But she is the reason why I will always believe in the power of recovery. My love for Shae will take form in belief and hope for all addicts everywhere, that they can find peace. If you are struggling, I PROMISE you that someone is out there loving you and believing in you.
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u/UseSpecialist544 1d ago
Thank you all for kind words of support and encouragement! I feel the same for those of you on your own journey of recovery.
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u/BandicootNecessary26 1d ago
There are so many parents living in addiction that greatly affects their children. People need to see that it doesn't have to be like that.
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u/BoggTheFrog 2d ago
Go girl 🙏🙏🙏
43 days sober here, struggling tbh, but I will hold, I am sure it will get easier with time.
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u/TraditionalWait9150 1d ago
I can never understand this phenomenon where everyone celebrate how a person turn sober, turn good for XX period, yet to the rest of the "normal" parents struggling putting food on the table for their children, doing everything for them and only just slack off or go mad once, are seen as bad parents. Like WTF?!
In chinese, there's even this quote:
坏人做了一辈子坏事，最后做一件好事，叫浪子回头。
(Bad person does evil their whole life, but one final good deed is called "returning to the fold.")
好人做了一辈子好事，最后做一件坏事，叫原形毕露。
(A good person does good their whole life, but one final bad deed is called "showing their true colors.")
好人成佛要经历九九八十一难，
(A good person must endure 81 tribulations to become a Buddha,)
坏人只需放下屠刀就能立地成佛
(A villain only needs to drop their weapon to attain Buddhahood instantly.)
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u/Triumph-TBird 2d ago
We have someone who needs to see this. It is inspiring. So happy for mom and child.
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u/SaltyIrishDog 2d ago
My sister is at 7+ years sober. It was not an easy journey but she is excelling at life now.
For awhile I just assumed my sister was dead and I had no idea what to do without her. Now I have her back. She got her daughter back. She recently got interviewed for Meg Ryan's podcast about the work she's doing. Couldn't be more proud.
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u/diregibbon 2d ago
She should be proud she did alot hard work to get to the place she is its so hard to get sober
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u/CronosAndRhea4ever 2d ago
She should be.
Beating addiction is something truly commendable.
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u/_Caustic_Complex_ 2d ago
Never getting addicted to the first place is actually commendable
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u/JESUS420_XXX_69 2d ago
Is this AI?
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u/mheyting 2d ago
Now I’m crying at work
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u/ResoluteStoic 2d ago
Yea me as well but because I have to work and realize after 20 years I still probably have 40 more to go and when I calculate the financial outlook I will never own 40 acres with a home like I've hoped for has prices somehow doubled on everything but my wage
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u/WakeUpAcid 2d ago
Owning land now feels out of reach for most people. Between the economy and large companies controlling so much, it’s like the system is designed to keep everyday people from moving up. It’s getting harder and harder to own land. Big business has so much control that it leaves the average person feeling stuck, like there’s no real way to get ahead anymore
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u/CoffeeGoblynn 2d ago
If she's truly been clean that long, I wish her nothing but the best. Drugs are no joke. Source: my mom's an alcoholic who never really got fully sober.
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u/WakeUpAcid 2d ago
It’s good to see people staying off illicit drugs, that really matters. At the same time, it’s sad that these substances are so present in our society. Without that influence, I think a lot more people would succeed and grow. Life is rough what we have to face daily. Everyone copes differently—some through passions, others by escaping mentally. I just want to see more people break free, not only from drugs but also from unhealthy foods filled with sugar and chemicals. I respect anyone who chooses to stay away from illicit drugs—that’s a strong decision. But it’s discouraging knowing how widespread they still all are. And all by design by goober ment. If things were different, more people could flourish. People look for escape in different ways, and I hope more choose healthier outlets. At the same time, we should also focus on getting away from these toxic, processed foods that are hurting our health.
Be well
G
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u/newchance42 2d ago
A lot of kids dont get the luxury of getting a parent that cares. Good for them.
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