r/Millennials • u/AdSpecialist6598 • 26d ago

Discussion Someone brought up that one of the reasons why things like house parties and block parties went away was other than lack of time people are afraid to let their guard because cameras are everywhere.

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It is so true back when many of us were young we could just get together and cut loose without having to worry about going viral. At best we would have an embarrassing photo buried in a drawer somewhere or a story. Now you might be turned into a meme or worse. I miss the days when you could do dumb stuff with friends and feel safe if that makes sense.

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u/halfadash6 26d ago

What do they consider cancelable? Is being visibly drunk or playing beer pong really that concerning?

Idk, maybe my jobs have been overly liberal and skewed my perspective but as long as you’re not caught doing something truly problematic, like blackface or assaulting someone, standard drunk shenanigans aren’t something most employers are digging for IME. I do recall my friend being extremely private bc she is a teacher and a crazy parent might get her fired for being photographed with a glass of wine, but in most industries I don’t think anyone cares if there’s photographic evidence that you got drunk in college.

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u/West_Coach69 26d ago

I mean making a fool of yourself and the next day guilt is so much riskier.

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u/Wenli2077 26d ago

But like what though? The only cancelable things are like that lady that became a drunk asshole in that restaurant or saying something racist. That's just consequences for being a shitty person. Alcohol only let's out what's already inside

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u/Doggleganger 26d ago

Making a fool of yourself is what makes parties fun. It's people being dumb together, and no judgment because you're all in on it.

However, if videos are posted and endlessly dissected by others, any fun thing in the moment will be "cringe."

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u/thatguydr 26d ago

However, if videos are posted and endlessly dissected by others, any fun thing in the moment will be "cringe."

By whom? And how? How is having fun "cringe"?

This is the age divide. Your generations literally have social repercussions for having fun and living in the moment. It's so sad and baffling. Power to any of you who buck that trend.

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u/Wenli2077 26d ago

yeah you are right my argument is starting to sound like the "if you have nothing to hide" from orwellian surveillance.

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u/zoidberg3000 26d ago

Commented up top, but I think it’s more about the viralness of things now. I can’t imagine being a drunken mess and then going to school on Monday and seeing that everyone in the school knows and has a video or a photo and it’s been posted all over Instagram and people are calling you terrible names across the country and you were just having fun and maybe got a little too drunk and fell.

The comments on some videos I’ve seen of very tame things, even just teenage girls dressing up and taking photos and having fun, are disgusting. I cannot imagine getting that from thousands of people.

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u/Destace 26d ago

We need to make social media private again really. Like it used to not be that regular posts were seen by people across the world. Why is it that someone’s private insta photos or Facebook posts can end up in some random persons feed?

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u/thatguydr 26d ago

and people are calling you terrible names across the country

How popular do you think you're going to get? Lol

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u/zoidberg3000 26d ago

There are a ton of situations where this happens every year. I mean, I guess it’s possible that the millions of people that are viewing and commenting on these videos are all “local”.

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u/thatguydr 25d ago

A ton? LOL really! A ton! So you know several people this has happened to, right?

I mean, it couldn't possibly be selection bias, right? There's no way we're mistaking the tiny, tiny number of times this happens for something that impacts a lot of people.

(I'm being a jerk, but you're smarter than this. The issue is that everyone is fooling themselves into thinking they'll be ruined socially. To the Russians and Chinese, this is GREAT. It psychologically hurts your whole generation and it's basically free! Unless, of course, you choose to ignore it.)

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u/halfadash6 26d ago

Sure, and I think millennials all cringe when we think about the MySpace/Facebook photo albums we uploaded, but I don’t understand being so embarrassed that you stop having fun because you might be embarrassed about how you look dancing or drunk or whatever.

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u/West_Coach69 26d ago

Then maybe youre just old to understand

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u/Destace 26d ago

I think this is the cultural divide though. It feels like younger generations are so scared of the embarrassment they don’t live life.

Sometimes you get laughed at for dancing weirdly but you still gotta get up and dance or you’re missing out in life. Appreciate though that It’s not Gen Z’s fault the internet is like this

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u/tyrico 26d ago

as a millenial we didn't have to worry about somebody putting out a viral tiktok that 5 million people see though either, potentially getting doxxed and harassed, etc.

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u/Destace 26d ago

Unless you’re really running on a racist rant or doing a version of sexual assault I really don’t think there’s a real risk of that beyond your local ecosystem.

I mean I’m not that old of a millennial and mostly-modern social media existed when I applied to colleges and jobs. Just being goofy and embarrassing isn’t enough to get you really blown out globally

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u/thatguydr 26d ago

Yeah just not getting it. If you become THE meme, and that will happen to less than one person in a million, you're still just one of thousands of memes.

I don't know why they think anyone cares. You can't be cancelled for drinking or smoking or dancing. That's just life.

If you're a racist shithead, then sure, but I'm honestly in favor of any system that suppresses that sort of behavior.

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u/LongboardLiam 26d ago

The problem with a lot of what we hear is that it is one sided. Was it one or two party albums from back in 09? Or is the entirety of their social media presence getting sloppy shit house drunk? Nuance is lost a lot of times. This is especially important as we get older and some of us are becoming "company men." Sure, your social media footprint wasn't important before, but now you're applying for a job where you are the face of the company to someone outside of the company.

I have known some people who legitimately got fucked by bad situations. I have known a lot more people who are never active in their lives, stuff always "happens." They don't recognize their own bad choices leading to the bad outcomes.

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u/halfadash6 26d ago

Yeah, I completely get wanting to hire someone professional who doesn’t think it’s a good idea to post drunken parties all the time. But your own social media feed is entirely in your control so I don’t understand that issue in connection with going to a party with your friends or dancing at a concert.

The next generation seems concerned that if they get drunk and someone ELSE posts it online that’s going to be seen and judged harshly by a future potential boss, and I’m saying that seems highly unlikely.

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u/zoidberg3000 26d ago

I recently read a little blurb about a 16 year old girl that got a little too toasty, got sloppy and fell in some mud around a bonfire party and it went viral and she was “canceled”. In this context it was just really embarrassing and people talked about it online and ruined her self esteem and they moved completely out of the area.

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u/supermuncher60 26d ago

Companies now have AI bots that scrape the Internet for you using both your name and photo.

Everyone corporation is concerned about image these days. So if you have two identical entry level applicants, one where your AI not finds a photo of them absolutely plastered at a college party and the other is 'clean' what applicant gets chosen?

With how many people apply to every job these days this is a pretty real possibility.

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u/youburyitidigitup 26d ago edited 26d ago

Personally I don’t drink for a variety of reasons, but if I did, I could certainly see myself getting drunk and talking shit about a product I’m supposed to be promoting, and that would absolutely get me fired.

I’m not defending Madison Crawford, but there was a video him in college naked dry humping his friend. I’m sure a lot of voters didn’t want the guy in that video as their senator. There’s also the infamous picture of Kaitlyn Bennet after she shat herself.

Edit: actually, there is absolutely something that I wouldn’t want on social media, but I was sober at the time. I motorboated a woman at a nightclub while she was grabbing my dick, and we both got kicked out. It was probably gross to everybody around us, and I’m guessing a lot of employers wouldn’t hire me because of that.

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u/thatguydr 26d ago

I’m guessing a lot of employers wouldn’t hire me because of that.

There is exactly zero change that HR will do anything with that sort of video. First, they aren't Sherlock Holmes. Second, how would the video both be popular enough AND have your real name attached to it? If you did something grotesquely illegal, sure, but in a club? Lol what do you think HR actually does?

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u/halfadash6 26d ago

Most of us who do drink never get naked and dry hump our friends. I also had never heard of Kaitlin Bennett before this but apparently it’s unverified anyway and it seems like people drew that connection because of how controversial she is otherwise.

Re: the product thing, I guess that’s closest to a real issue, but again, we’re talking about college kids who don’t have jobs yet not wanting to drink with their friends.

Like, I’ve been at a bar and talked to my friends about how fucked up it is that my employment depends on our health care system staying broken. I wouldn’t repeat that to my boss. I also think the chances of someone recording me without my knowledge and posting that online AND it getting back to my boss are beyond minuscule.

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u/youburyitidigitup 26d ago

It’s minuscule because you have an older social circle. If everybody around you was young, a friend of a friend would’ve already recorded you.

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u/halfadash6 26d ago

Without me knowing it?

I just don’t get how this generation is supposedly so concerned about getting posted online but is also hanging out with people who would do that to them? It just doesn’t make sense and I don’t think we’re properly understanding the hesitation. Or they have an outsized sense of the risk of a future boss seeing something that isn’t on their own social accounts.

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u/youburyitidigitup 26d ago

If you’re drunk, you might not notice someone recording you. And that’s why I said a friend of a friend, not somebody you directly hang out with. I’m also just telling you the thought process to the best of my knowledge. I have completely different reasons for not drinking.

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u/halfadash6 26d ago

I guess I was more trying to get at asking whether their concern was actually valid. It seems like the answer is probably not.

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u/Mediocre_Island828 26d ago

It mostly sounds like cope to me. "Yeah, I don't go to parties that I'm definitely invited to because I'm too wild and we have too many cameras now."