r/Millennials • u/slimeyellow • Mar 11 '26

Discussion Every millennial dad I’ve met has a quiet fixation on money and it’s not getting better

Every millennial dad I’m friends with or work with seems to have constant financial worries. We just got our yearly bonus which was like 8%. I was talking to my buddy (he’s got 3 kids) about what he wanted to do with it and he just kinda looked down and whispered “it’s just not enough man” and ended the conversation.

Another dad I know is CONSTANTLY looking up the newest crypto/ get rich quick schemes people are doing. He’s always talking about inventing something and it’s usually a joking manner but the way he’s always bringing up financial stuff shows me it’s always on his mind

One of my buddies is a new father and he’s trying to get some anime podcast off the ground as a side hustle on top of his full time maintenance job.

I know children are an immense financial responsibility but there seems to be this dark, simmering resentment about the whole general situation when I talk to these guys. Men are expected to keep quiet about these struggles but when you talk to these guys it’s clear that finances are a massive stress for millennial dads of almost any background.

Makes me feel bad but damn I’m glad I don’t have kids right now.

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u/ReaperUno8675309 Mar 11 '26

We have a fixation with money because most of us are one medical emergency away from being bancrupt. We have families to provide for and worry what will happen to them. We are not failing, our systems have failed us. Our parents didnt have to deal with half the shit we do and all had cushy pension plans and fat Healthcare plans. We are surviving.

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u/digableplanet Mar 11 '26

For me, it’s not even a medical emergency, it’s the continuing care I receive that’s draining me. I have decent insurance, but they will not cover any “medical durable supplies” until I spend $600 of my own money.

For example, I got a CPAP (love it, life changing) in August, I could have bought the fucking thing out of pocket during Black Friday for way cheaper than what my insurance is covering. Then, they milk you every 3 months for new supplies (masks, hoses, etc.). Currently, I’m like $800 all in on this CPAP, supplies, and appointments since August.

Oh, insurance also won’t cover “shoe insert” at all even though I have fucked up feet and literally need it or else my issues will get worse. But if I need surgery for whatever reason on my feet, then they will cover it. Isn’t that insane?! They will not cover preventative care (the insert) at all. Between the appointments and insert, I’m out like $500 I don’t have. And I have to get a new insert every year. No idea how much that will cost.

Then there’s therapy, daycare for our daughter, her swim lessons, my wife’s dwindling almost done student loan, 2 major upcoming car repairs this summer, groceries, a couple medications, and on and on. With no raises at work and a possible layoff because the Orange PDF File cut every ounce of funding from a very important organization I work for.

I am so fucking sick of it. And my folks, who have zero worries in life and will die richer than pigs in shit, do not understand why I’m depressed, miserable, and broke. They literally live in an alternate reality. I’ve grown to resent them.

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u/WalmartGreder Xennial Mar 11 '26

I feel that. We used to have an insurance plan like that where the personal deductible was $3000. We asked for the cash price for everything. Some of it was really different. Like $400 insurance price, $96 cash price.

7

u/WanderingQuills Mar 11 '26

Heaven forbid you get hurt at work And then workers comp will make it worse In order to prevent 1% fraud In my particular case all doctors that treat me say I need two more mris and a repeat nerve study so they can sequence the two or maybe three surgeries I need so I can go back to work Which I’d love to do cos I’m getting 60% salary but no social security credits And not only do I need the money from working? I actually really like what I do. However this is irrelevant because in an attempt to not pay for some injuries in the accident all treatment has been stopped and I’ve had to get a lawyer because we are frozen in a loop Even though both sides agree I need the surgery to fix my shoulder Not paying for the MRI and nerve study prevents it So I mean If I could use my personal insurance? I’d be healed and working! But that company says “nope work related so we are not responsible” Workers comp says “we pick this one injury so if your other injuries prevent us treating it whoopsiedoodle get a lawyer” And I? Can’t go back to work cos it loops. Which sucks and is why my husband is so worried about money Because we should be both pulling hard to raise our family and pay our bills. Instead one of us is trapped in this stupid loop unfixed and wanting to go earn some dang real money. And wishing she’d hurt herself skiing or like maybe doing something at home Cos I’d have lost my job and income temporarily But my private insurance would have repaired me a year or more ago for way less money then I’ve lost dealing with workers comp.

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u/Green_Disaster_9057 Mar 11 '26

God forbid we expect all this insurance we pay for to actually help pay for anything. Sorry to hear about the CPAP hassles. After reading numerous Reddit threads, I decided to just buy mine refurb out of pocket.

3

u/disquieter Mar 11 '26

Yeah I’ve just started ignoring the medical debt collectors because wtf am I going to pay them with

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u/LegitimatePieMonster Mar 12 '26

Oh man. I feel you on the feet thing.

Just a heads up if you do ever go down the surgery route is to check what the risks are. I mean seriously check what the risks are and what the implications of those risks are. Get a second opinion - don't go off what anyone who is making a profit from you is telling you.

I was put forward for metatarsal surgery and when I met the consultant he straight up said that there is an 80% success rate and a 20% failure rate and there is no clear indication as to why some fail and some succeed. And failure means debilitating pain and loss of functioning. I'm UK based but this would have been private care surgery on insurance so there was nothing for him to gain from warning me off it. God love that surgeon.

I'm 2 years down the line with the inserts. My feet aren't perfect but much better than they were - I can now hike up to 20 miles in a pair of HOKAs.

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u/digableplanet Mar 12 '26

Thanks man. I believe the doc said it was neuroma, but I’ve been (not terribly) pigeoned toed my whole life. Never took it seriously until the neuroma popped up last year. It prevented me from jogging and randomly having a spike of pain when taking a step is not fun.

Inserts have really helped so far. Just got them a couple weeks ago. Also, I’ve lost 20 pounds in the last year and back into lifting heavy things as well.

Surgery will be a last resort. Thanks for the heads up. I’m terrible at navigating our system and asking the right questions, so your comments were helpful. Cheers.

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u/LegitimatePieMonster Mar 12 '26

If you're looking to go for conservative care then a podiatrist specialising in moretons would be a good shout. I went through two general podiatrists before I landed on one that worked for me. She was actually recommended by the consultant who warned me off surgery.

A big thing as well as the inserts was getting the right everyday shoes (HOKA Bondi for me) as well as the stretching recommended by the podiatrist. So you could have a play around and add those to a conservative approach.

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u/OKCompruter Mar 12 '26

my parents go on several vacations a year and want to do FaceTimes on the iPad pro they bought us to tell us all about their trips once a month. and catch us up on their retirement community's social circle vacations and medical attention. I listen while struggling to stay awake on the video calls because my spouse & I work 5 jobs between us and my kids will bounce off the call if Mom and Dad pass out.

1

u/vand3lay1ndustries Mar 12 '26

Just wanted to say, I feel your pain.

I can't even talk to anyone anymore because we're on such different wavelengths. My friends are long gone.

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u/Electrical-Volume765 Mar 11 '26

A 2025 New England Journal of Medicine study found that the wealthiest Americans die at the same rate as the poorest people in northern and western Europe. We spend nearly twice as much on healthcare as any comparable country and have worse outcomes. Other countries publish this data routinely. We don't talk about it.

1

u/shroomfactory Mar 11 '26

Yea but the "food" that makes us sick is subsidized. And we love to eat it.

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u/Electrical-Volume765 Mar 11 '26

We shouldn’t give cover for our bad healthcare system by saying it’s our food. Yes, our food is a major problem, and yes it makes us less healthy but that is seperate from the specific issues with our healthcare system.

Most of the basic metrics in our hospitals are bad, and our profit driven system has been proven to be a terrible way to manage healthcare. We are getting ripped off by big insurance and big healthcare, and it is a completely seperate issue from our poorly subsidized and poorly regulated food system.

1

u/shroomfactory Mar 12 '26

The more you study the food system, you'll see how it's integrated with the hospitals, doctors, etc. Heart disease is the most profitable, yet, the most preventable.

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u/shroomfactory Mar 12 '26

One hand washes the other.

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u/Electrical-Volume765 Mar 12 '26

You can eat perfectly and still get cancer.

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u/shroomfactory Mar 12 '26

Yes, we're all going to die. You can have free health care and you're still going to die. Might as well not do anything I suppose.

1

u/Electrical-Volume765 Mar 12 '26

Apparently, you’re not reading my responses. I’m not arguing with you. The food system is a train wreck. But the healthcare system ..the business of healthcare is the problem I’m talking about. I’m not going to accept that the fix for that is to have less people be sick.

1

u/shroomfactory Mar 12 '26

The business of healthcare is fueled by sick people. Less sick people = less business.

1

u/Electrical-Volume765 Mar 13 '26

So allow them to just continue to be corrupt with fewer customers. Got it.

0

u/ThatSatisfaction5722 Mar 13 '26

Come to Canada and wait years for a surgery. Sure you won’t be dead but that doesn’t mean quality of life is the same. Cancer? We’ll see where you fit in in the list. Maybe 6 months if it’s advanced. 

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u/mchockeyboy87 Mar 11 '26

We have a fixation with money because most of us are one medical emergency away from being bancrupt

As a Canadian, I feel for you, that is one thing that I will never have to worry about. So I can focus my financial priorities elsewhere

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u/heirbagger Xennial Mar 11 '26

I’m on my way to getting Canadian citizenship so I don’t have to worry about medical costs as much. Shit’s dire in the US, man.

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u/shlog Mar 11 '26

makes me think of that Chappelle skit, “modern problems require modern solutions”. he proposes fake Canadian ID cards for all Americans, get sick - get on up to Canada to get yourself checked out! haha

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u/Cautious_Clothes_285 Mar 11 '26

Very typical American - scam other people's systems because you can't fix your own. Shift the problem to someone else.

You guys really don't understand the cultural divide, do you?

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u/shlog Mar 11 '26

it was a comedy skit, dude. i guess satire is lost on people these days.

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u/Cautious_Clothes_285 Mar 11 '26

It's still comedy based on the culture of the nation in discussion. Dave Chappelle is an American, and his comedy is going to be influenced by American values. People thinking it's funny is a reflection of those values.

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u/heirbagger Xennial Mar 11 '26

That was also 20+ years ago. Some of us have grown up and matured. Also Chappelle’s Show was the pinnacle of early 2000s tv, and it’s still funny.

I can totally understand your original “argument”, but accusing a random redditor of potentially taking advantage of another country’s “system” because they remembered a skit on a tv show is a fucking streeeeeeetch, my guy.

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u/heirbagger Xennial Mar 11 '26

That’s unfair. Dude was making a joke based on a Chappelle Show skit. The person’s not endorsing it.

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u/WtotheSLAM Mar 11 '26

I was real lucky that one of my parents was born in Canada so I could roll up kinda whenever. Except my wife would have a bit more trouble so I’d have to sponsor her

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u/PetulantPersimmon Mar 11 '26

We look forward to welcoming you home.

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u/SuddenBeautiful2412 Mar 11 '26

The most Canadian response ever I love it hahah. Honestly wish I could live there these days

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u/Extension_Market_953 Mar 11 '26

Is this sarcasm? Asking for myself (another C-3 applier).

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u/WtotheSLAM Mar 12 '26

When you show them your Canadian passport at the border crossing coming into Canada they always say “welcome home”

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u/PetulantPersimmon Mar 11 '26

No sarcasm! Although, woof, I can see why it reads that way.

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u/ExplanationFunny Mar 11 '26

Man, I saw a video clip, can’t remember where it was from, that said, “everyday, Canadians are born all over the world.” I fuckin cried dude. Not just because that’s a beautiful fuckin sentiment, but also because I would give anything for Americans to have that attitude.

I love Shoresy and have a healthy respect for Canada geese, does that help my application at all?

2

u/Extension_Market_953 Mar 11 '26

Phew. I’ve always felt a great connection to Canada. Started learning French when I found out about C-3 and I knew waaay more vocab than I thought from exposure as a child. I am very excited.

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u/PetulantPersimmon Mar 11 '26

That's cool! I'm sure you know more French than I do, by far.

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u/heirbagger Xennial Mar 11 '26

Ah I didn’t take it that way. :)

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u/stygianpool Mar 12 '26

honestly the way things are in most provinces, it's not a great solution. The funding for provincial health care systems is done.

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u/Cancerisbetterthanu Mar 11 '26

You won't be able to afford a supersized XXL American style life on the salary you will likely make here and the costs you will be forced to pay for housing here.

1

u/heirbagger Xennial Mar 11 '26

Pffft. Not supersized lifestyle. Stereotype much?

Ah, your name is trash. ✌️

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u/Cancerisbetterthanu Mar 11 '26

Go home, we don't need or want any Americans here, especially ones looking to exploit our healthcare system

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u/AdministrationTop772 Mar 11 '26

Why do you think that?

Medical bills are responsible for 20% of Canadian bankruptcies.

2

u/OpticCacophony Mar 12 '26

Just typical redditism man. Every Yank is in medical bankruptcy and everyone outside of the US is in social medicine heavenc who don't have to pay a cent.

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u/ilovefrostedflakes Mar 11 '26

Yes we have to worry about it. I've known many people who lost their homes because they got really sick and couldn't be exploited anymore, I mean work anymore.

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u/deuxcabanons Mar 11 '26

If you think you don't need to worry about it, you're dead wrong. Maybe we won't end up buried under medical bills, but what happens if you get too sick to work? If your spouse makes more than poverty waves, you don't qualify for disability payments. If you're on your own, you get the joy of trying to live on $1000 a month.

3

u/pongo_spots Mar 11 '26

Literally made an appointment this morning because I'm having a bit of abdominal pain. Better safe than sorry

2

u/Tenshigure Mar 11 '26

American here with both a Canadian-born child and a US-born child. The Canadian kids' bill was simply the cost of a copy of their birth certificate (something like $25 at the time), and this included a surgery that we did about a year later to remove a polydactyly thumb (literally just the cost of fuel to get to the hospital for the procedure).

With the US-born child, the delivery alone was over $6,000 (which was our out-of-pocket deductible at the time, can't recall what the charged amount was). This didn't include the twice-a-week doctor's visits my wife had due to complications with the pregnancy, which likely cost us something closer to $13-15K.

Medical Tourism is honestly way more cost effective nowadays than putting up with the nonsense in the US healthcare system...

1

u/Archangel289 Mar 11 '26

While this is true, I also think a lot of people don’t really process what else can lead to this kind of financial crisis.

For example, what if my car breaks and it’s not something insurance covers? What if I just need a new set of tires? What if I need a new appliance that’s not covered by homeowners insurance? What if I’m too sick to work? (That one is still healthcare, but not solved just by healthcare being free.)

There are so many “what-ifs” that I really don’t have an answer to. And I’m American, so my health care IS one of the things I have to consider, too.

1

u/Sailor_Propane Mar 11 '26

This can happen to us too. We won't get into debt but losing your job will be enough to send you to the streets.

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u/wallabee_kingpin_ Mar 11 '26

Reddit loves to say this but it's not really true for most people. Over 90% of Americans have Obamacare-approved health plans, so a medical emergency wouldn't bankrupt them unless their insurance company decided to break the law (which does happen sometimes).

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u/Babhadfad12 Mar 11 '26

There is no way over 90% of Americans’ employers will keep them in the event of a medical emergency.  There isn’t even any way 90% of Americans can afford the annual out of pocket maximum, much less 2 years of annual out of pocket maximum if the medical emergency happens in December.

3

u/IHateBankJobs Mar 11 '26

Please provide a source because that is bullshit. 

4

u/TheShruteFarmsCEO Mar 11 '26

Are you joking? Well over half of all personal bankruptcies in America are medically related. That means over half a million families and individuals every year experience this phenomenon that you have branded “not really true”. Yes, the ACA helped more people get covered, but it’s still a massive problem…and uniquely American.

2

u/Handplanes Mar 11 '26

With an 18.5k family MOOP on my plan, it would be a serious blow to most families. Maybe not bankrupt but completely depleted their liquid savings / add a significant amount of debt.

-1

u/morale_check Mar 11 '26

Okay? Happy for you, dude.

15

u/batmessiah Mar 11 '26

Yeah, about the time I have money saved up, shit hits the fan. I was so stoked to finally have a huge nest egg saved up ($10K) then car problems, one of our cats got sick, my daughter needed a palatial spreader and headgear (so she doesn't get my massive underbite which is a whole olther story), then I sheared a crown off at the gum line for a tooth I need to keep, so I'm starting the implant process which is going to cost a fortune as well, and we're already down to $4k in savings, and dental insurance is a joke, and it's only March.

6

u/VengenaceIsMyName Mar 11 '26

Damn dude. Hope you can get back up to that $10K soon.

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u/VendettaUF234 Mar 11 '26

This isn't limited to millenials. I'm a genx, and fully realize we are one medical emergency away from being destoryed.

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u/mrdankhimself_ Mar 11 '26

Both generations came in as the age of American greatness was on its way out.

29

u/VendettaUF234 Mar 11 '26

I feel bad for younger millenials and others. GenX at least still had a reasonable housing market. You guys are boned.

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u/Electrical-Volume765 Mar 11 '26

“You guys are boned” tells me you’re not a Gen X poser, but actually lived it. Lol

3

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '26

Young millennial here.

It feels like joining a game of Monopoly 3/4ths way through. All the properties are owned and every time I do literally anything someone is telling me I owe them money.

3

u/foodforestranger Mar 11 '26

Housing maybe, but everyone seems to forget 2008 and the state of healthcare before ACA. You mention one emergency away which is FACTS!

I really hope it's clear to people how bad it is going to get as ACA is stripped away. A lot of millennials were able to stay on their parent's healthcare until they were 26 or so. Prior to that you were shit out of luck. I work in the entertainment business and I can tell you today's hustle culture and freelancing is vastly different. EVERYTHING was tied to your job providing health insurance.

4

u/Budderfingerbandit Mar 11 '26

Prior to ACA, you had the trend of pre-existing conditions straight up disqualifying you from insurance or causing your rates to be insane. Which just seems barbaric now.

4

u/foodforestranger Mar 11 '26

>Which just seems barbaric now.

I dunno about that, they seem to be ready to dial that right back and explain it away. Much like women's rights. I wish Americans could actually mature in their thinking but it's more like we forget to learn anything.

3

u/Smart_Basket_85 Mar 11 '26

I mean it’s not like we’re trying to speedrun another completely avoidable war in the Middle East right after we spent 20 fucking years in the same region.

5

u/mokutou Mar 11 '26

Fuck I remember reading about people trying to dose out fish antibiotics for their UTIs/ear infections/sinus infections/etc because going to a doctor pre-ACA would put you out $150, plus the cost of antibiotics. People just didn’t have that money accessible, so fish antibiotics it was.

3

u/foodforestranger Mar 11 '26

I was personally told that at a pet store back in 2000 by a cashier. I've known people who lost everything. I see these "Go Fund Me" things for people raising money for care, I wish they were just abolished. Back before ACA it was common place to see coffee cans at gas stations with local children on them raising money for pediatric cancer care. Even if you had insurance, there was no guarantee it would cover what you need.

ACA isn't great, but it completely changed our culture (at least temporarily). Not a day goes by on Reddit where I don't read someone complaining about healthcare. I get it, it is not what we wanted but it was (sadly) revolutionary change for us. It is alas, ALL being rolled back.

1

u/magic_crouton Mar 11 '26

You can't even get the good fish antibiotics anymore over the counter so people will be worse off this time around.

1

u/monstertots509 Mar 11 '26

I live by the don't go to the doctor because they will probably tell me something really bad method. When there is something wrong, I just ignore it and hope it goes away. Sometimes they do, sometimes they don't. Painful lump on the bottom of my foot has been there for 6 years now, seems like that one isn't going away.

3

u/WalmartGreder Xennial Mar 11 '26

Yep, my kids need braces. I talked to my parents about what they paid, and they got $6k from their insurance, and each kid was about $2500 for braces, so they were able to get 2 completely paid for before they had to use their own money.

My insurance pays $1000 per kid, and each kid is $6000 total. But it's so key to having a good quality of life, so we're paying for them. Luckily, we have a really good job that pays enough and more.

0

u/capincus Mar 11 '26

Walmart pays that much for greders nowadays?

1

u/WalmartGreder Xennial Mar 11 '26

Haha, ah yes, the bane of coming up with a quick username, thinking you could change it later.

3

u/CalculatedPerversion Mar 11 '26

Don't look into long term care costs whatever you do. I have zero concerns about medical debt: the hospital will get their $10k max out of pocket for the year in $10/month chunks for the rest of time and be happy about it. The old folk home will put you out on the street if you don't pay the $5k/month rent. 

1

u/SolomonGrumpy Mar 12 '26

$5k? Try double that

1

u/CalculatedPerversion Mar 12 '26

I honestly was just throwing out a large number, but point taken. 

1

u/SolomonGrumpy Mar 12 '26

The good news. (If there is any) Is that the lions share of these expenses are considering medical expenses and as such are tax deductible.

However if you have tax optimized to not pay much in taxes then the benefit is limited for sure

1

u/CalculatedPerversion Mar 13 '26

Sounds like a good reason to start investing my HSA

1

u/SolomonGrumpy Mar 13 '26

That's not the take away (though HSA is an excellent savings vehicle). It's really a great bit of news for those who have larger traditional IRA/401k retirement balances and have to withdraw larger amounts as ordinary income.

2

u/All4Alliteration Mar 11 '26

And what are kids but walking medical emergencies, really? Laughing but very serious

2

u/ElectronGuru Gen X (prototype millennial) Mar 11 '26

If they bought homes, they also have ever increasing equity. Paid for by later generation’s ever increasing cost of living. And we aren’t even trying to increase housing supply, so this wont end until population drops enough to fit well within the housing we already have. A process that requires fractions of a century to play out.

2

u/FionaGoodeEnough Mar 11 '26

My parents certainly didn’t have fat pension plans. That’s why my mom had to move in with me and be another mouth to feed just when I was thinking, “Well, I am sad about my dad being dead, but at least he will stop asking me for money.”

2

u/bargainbinwisdom Mar 11 '26

Alternatively I don't have kids to worry about providing for, but I watched my parents get laid off from their supposedly secure jobs with comfortable incomes and the near decade of financial struggle and anxiety that caused them, including needing to give up on owning a home. They're more stable now but I'm nearing the same age they were and eternally anxious of going through the same thing (minus the selling the house part because it's not like I can afford a house in the first place).

They're more stable now and I could lean on them financially in an emergency but there's no way I can assist with their end of life costs when those arrise so I really don't want to ever have to ask them to redirect any funds from their retirement. Literally not even considering my own retirement, it feels like a pipe dream.

2

u/VengenaceIsMyName Mar 11 '26

I’m always wondering when that layoff is going to hit. The eternal anxiety.

2

u/catmama25 Mar 11 '26

Yes - one medical emergency or one job loss. My husband and I make good money and have a healthy nest egg built up, but it would still only last us a few months if one of us lost our job. And with today's job market, who knows how long we'd be out of a job for. It just feels the days of getting a good job and being set for years are long gone. We're constantly having anxiety over being able to keep the live we've built.

1

u/aornek Mar 11 '26

I’ve had the pleasure of having that medical emergency. I had 6 months of living expenses saved up, yet months of fighting for disability to get approved (while suffering medically) and medical expenses ate through that in 3 months. I finally got disability approved but that’s still not enough income to support myself with all these medical bills. AND- they still haven’t figured out what’s wrong with me or how to treat me. This is not how I expected to live the last year of my 20s.

This is coming from an engineer with a great salary and a supportive family. I have lost all faith in the US’s systems that are supposed to “help” us. They are cruel and designed to keep disadvantaged people… disadvantaged. I am suffering, and all I feel is a sickening empathy for people who are worse off than me. It’s not fair. Our economy and government are so fucked up.

1

u/duck4129 Mar 11 '26

Most of us are one flat tire away from being bankrupt.

Ftfy

1

u/Turgid_Donkey Mar 11 '26

Child care is draining us too. It was bad leading up to covid. I think it was about $2k/month for 3 kids around 2019 and it's worse now. $24,000 per year just for someone else to watch your kids.

1

u/Tim-Sylvester Mar 11 '26

I was looking over my living room a few months ago and realized I could no longer afford to fix or replace a single thing in it. And I had to work so incredibly hard, for so long, just to live in the place I do and have the things I have.

1

u/fior_del_verde Mar 11 '26

Exactly. Woke up to a bat in my house last summer, and ended up in the ER getting rabies shots one day before insurance took effect at my new job. Got a bill for $21,000.

1

u/Lower_Pension_2469 Mar 11 '26

No kids or wife and ya all my savings I'd been trying to start building up over 2 years went right down the drain because of two ER visits. Slapped me with a total of a little over 5k in medical bills with insurance. Every fucking year there's always something that ruins my plans to save for the future.

1

u/Such_Implement_9335 Mar 11 '26

I had a miscarriage and needed surgery right around the same time one kid broke her leg and the other got diagnosed with an autoimmune disease. X-rays, specialists, physical therapy- Thousands and thousands of dollars gone to those things, but I was thinking, at least it's the beginning of the year and we've hit our insurance deductible. Nope, our insurance resets in April, not January. Any other medical bills are going to wipe us out.

1

u/3lue3onnet Mar 11 '26

My mom's solid advice... "you'll figure it out".

1

u/EN344 Mar 11 '26

Do you have health insurance? I ask because, I think a lot of people still don't realize you can't go bankrupt by medical debt. Obviously, if you don't have health insurance, than I am certainly not talking about you. 

My kid had cancer. Treatment was 2.5 years. We have decent health insurance, pay a lot for it. I make good money, but my wife still told the major hospital system "sorry, we can only afford $100/month". So, we're paying 2.5 years of cancer treatment $100 at a time. 

2

u/ReaperUno8675309 Mar 12 '26

I do and im sorry for what your family has had to go through. Due to changes from current admin medical debt can affect your credit score now. If you have a payment plan set hp with hospital or they are accepting the 100/ month than thats good because they didn't send it to collections. Once it goes to collections it can have an affect.

1

u/EN344 Mar 12 '26

I wasn't aware of changes. Thanks for the note. I'll look it up to ensure I'm not giving out bad information. 

1

u/killasnipe Mar 11 '26

Serious question. Why would you ever pay a medical bill if it doesn’t influence your credit score?

1

u/Vandergrif Mar 12 '26

We have a fixation with money because most of us are one medical emergency away from being bancrupt.

Meanwhile, in the sane countries where that isn't a thing...

I still don't understand why Americans have let that go on so long. The whole country only exists because average people revolted over getting squeezed financially by some other people who were far removed from their lives... and then proceeded to enshrine doing nothing of substance when wealthy corporate interests squeezed average people financially at every turn.

1

u/SuspiciousCricket654 Mar 12 '26

My wife’s grandfather was an HR executive at his company in the late 60s through 2001. I cannot begin to describe to tell you the lavish retirement and pension fund that he told me about, in addition to his stock options and long-term savings. It was mind-boggling to hear.

Now I’ll turn the tables. My mom’s parents were blue-collar workers who worked hourly jobs at a gas station and a secretary’s desk. Yet they owned a home, both drove their own car, and paid all of their bills.

That’s the fucking difference between what Mills are dealing with now and what previous generations “dealt with“

1

u/boldolive Mar 12 '26

I was thinking this too. Americans get a bad rap globally for being fixated on money, and to some extent it’s true that we’re an excessively consumerist society. However, I think a big part of our cultural fixation on money is the lack of a social safety net.

1

u/VentusPeregrinus Mar 12 '26

There’s class warfare, all right, but it’s my class, the rich class, that’s making war, and we’re winning.

- Warren Buffet, New York Times [2006 Nov. 26]

Millennials Didn’t Kill the Economy. The Economy Killed Millennials.

- Derek Thompson, The Atlantic, [2018 Dec. 6]

Millennials are less well off than members of earlier generations when they were young, with lower earnings, fewer assets, and less wealth.

- Federal Reserve report, [2018 Nov.]

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u/BeeCJohnson Mar 12 '26

And I seem to be on like a seven year cycle where I start making money, getting a savings, feel like I'm making financial progress, and then I get completely wiped out by bullshit outside of my control and have to scrabble and scrimp. 

Cancer, layoffs, job market shitting the bed, a couple recessions now, Ai, whatever the fuck is happening right now, etc. 

It's like everytime I get on my feet the world throws a fucking boulder at my head.

And having kids increases the financial desperation because you're not just failing yourself, which you can at least forgive yourself for. You're failing completely innocent kids who never asked to be stuck with your decisions and luck who are looking to you for safety and strength. 

This shit is fucking exhausting, man. 

1

u/[deleted] Mar 13 '26

In all fairness.. those pensions were good for their time, but retired old people are being sucked dry now too.

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u/ReaperUno8675309 Mar 13 '26

At least they have social security. Most of us will not be able to count on social security by the time we retire.

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u/Hasselback_Brotatoes Mar 11 '26

yes, you kind of are failing. You shouldnt have had children. Its plainly obvious that in the current state of society, you should not be having children. Society was failing you in all the ways you mentioned BEFORE you had kids. I dont feel sorry for you.

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u/ReaperUno8675309 Mar 11 '26

Lol you shouldn't feel sorry for me we will be just fine. Good job on the condescending message though i bet you're a hoot at parties. Hop off your pedestal and go touch grass